Operation: The ThreeHeaded Monkey
by Rebecca Cunningham
Summary: I'm Muarry, evil storyteller: Once upon a time, Xemnas, the king of the World That Never Was, decided to send Vexen and Marluxia on a mission. – Which contains fire and pure unsupervised EVIL. Warnings: AU, does not follow 358/2 Days, and MI spoilers.
1. Chapter I, Arrruugggghhhh!

Chapter 1, AAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHH!

Disclaimer: I don't own Monkey Island, Kingdom Hearts, and its characters. I do own the ocs and the ideas.

AN: You're now entering the Anti-slash zone, even though it is a 4/11 fic. Click the friendly back button if this does not suit your fancy.

2nd AN: Commentaries are in **bold**, unless otherwise.

**Roxas: Yep, I and a few friends of mine will take over for Muarry with these commentaries. Since he told us that he has a lot to do.**

"__!" roars the dreaded undead Capt. LeChuck. The reason for his rage was the fact that two handcuffed prisoners escaped, especially since they escape his fortress, Ft. Grevious Slug, located in the far reaches at the end of the world.

"I need the scientist to commission the construction of my Magnificent Flaming Voodoo Cannon Ball, just to impress the love of my life, Gov. Elaine Marley." Sighs LeChuck. He and his undead crew are in his throne room that was left undamanaged by the explosion. His skeletal minons dash off to get a ship ready to pursue their prisoners.

"I'm stuck in the worst world possible with the worst teacher possible." growls Marluxia. He and Vexen are in a crate being ship off to who-knows-where in the Caribbean, smuggling themselves in a large wooden crate addressed to a Mayor Phatt of Phatt Island. Normally they would teleport to a safer destination, but they got handcuff together, courtesy of Murray. But those two Nobodies get into an argument of where to go that it makes teleporting together unthinkable.

"I wanna murder someone." Vexen mutters, lots of inconceivable things already occurred, first of all they are alive, regardless of being inside a wooden crate which contains voodoo paraphillia. He assumes that they both will die of suffocation. It turns out that this box which does not have any air holes. For some reason they are still alive. Secondly, of all what was the Superior thinking? Yes, both he and Marluxia remember quite vividly of what happen three weeks ago…

-Where Nothing Gathers,

Vexen is in an extremely foul mood. The very arrogance! Xemnas called him (and anyone else) for a meeting of all things. He does not like being pulled away from his genetic engineering and torturing a Vexen Replica – He, the replica, was asking stupid questions.

Marluxia is bored. What's the point of these meetings? If he wants to know what's going on, he'll just ask Axel, Xigbar, and Luxord; but if he really wants to know the politics and the inner workings, it will be Lexaeus that will know.

Lexaeus Ishimoto. Number V, the Silent Hero. He's most of the neophytes' psychiatrist, teacher, and sort of a big brother to them. The reason why most of them hang out or even seek out the quiet senior founder was because he listens to them and takes their concerns seriously. If it weren't for Lexaeus, half of the Nobody neophytes would have left on day one. The only time when the neophytes teleport away was when Lexaeus needs a specimen to experiment on, especially when his friends, Vexen and Zexion, are involved. Speaking of Lexaeus, he and Luxord are on a mission.

"Who will go to the Melee Island world? If no one speaks, I will choose someone and send a partner with them." Xemnas smiles knowingly. They all hate it when he pairs them up with a partner and sends them to a world. Usually it's with someone they dislike.

"Superior!" Vexen Adachi whines. He brings out a list that extends down to his throne. "I purposed that we go to Port Royale instead, since it is filled with both the hearts and heartless specimens that I want to experiment on. Rumor also has it that it is just the same as the Melee Island world – Except not as colorful or…er… 'Cartoony.' In addition, I want to investigate an undead pirate to see how it remains alive or is it a special breed of Nobody."

Xemnas glares at Vexen. The illustrious leader hates it when anyone – Founder or neophyte – interrupts his speech that is seven minutes long, or more, but is informative nonetheless.

Everyone vanishes into the dark corridors. They know that Vexen is going to get it and they don't want to get sent on whatever punishment mission that Xemnas will assign the Chilly Academic to.

A few minutes later, Marluxia Kaya approaches Xemnas, in his office. "What's the importance of Melee Island, Superior? If both that world and this Port Royale are alike what's the point of going to either one, should we be harvesting the hearts in one place more frequently?" The Graceful Assassin read the reports of Lexaeus and Demyx. Both consists of parch lips, lack of food, evil monkeys, and the like, except the Melodious Nocturne sounds as though he was trap in a desert with everlasting sand dunes, and the several paragraphs which makes Lexaeus sound like a beef platter with vegetables on the side, well…makes Marluxia doubts the sitarist's sanity.

"Thank you for volunteering, Eleven. I had a most trying time finding volunteers for the expedition. Of course, I cannot doubt Number Four's claim for scientific possibilities. But the reason why I pick the Melee Island world was there is a fantastic beast to conduct experimentation on. It is the legendary Three-Headed monkey. There will be more information on this beast, which is a native of this world, on your mission field notes."

"And Port Royale does not contain a cousin for it."

"Precisely, Eleven." Marluxia does not like being preferred to as a number when they went to all that trouble to anagram his name. It makes him feel unimportant, inferior, and shows the cruel 'I don't care about you' emotionless way of addressing another by the senior members' part. Lexaeus calls them by number during a new guy's first few weeks, but the only one who calls them all by numbers is Xemnas. Not even the other five senior members do that.

4/11

"Precisely, Eleven, my foot." Marluxia growls softly, Vexen rolls his eyes. He may not see Marluxia, but he can guess how the younger neophyte is feeling right now. "Next time, Xemnas is coming to get stranded here and let's see how he likes it."

3rd AN: Credits for Princess of Rose for beta-ing it.

Letting readers know that since I have schoolwork, it'll take a long time for me to update the next chapters…It also depends on how long my homework is. However enjoy. :D


	2. Chapter II, Meeting Walt

**Roxas: The usual disclaimer, the authoress does not own anything but the ocs and the ideas. Credits to Princess of Rose for beta-ing it…And it's a bit quiet since Muarry went errand running.**

-Three weeks and five days later-

"Please. My name is Lando, and this is my nephew, Han." Vexen introduces himself and Marluxia to an enormously fat mayor, Governor Phatt; this guy is so obese that he has to remain in bed where tubes deliver his food. The two Nobodies are freed from their mailbox, finding themselves in a bedroom of the Phatt Island governor.

"Vexen. Marluxia. I had knowledge of you both before I ordered your crate to be open. You both will be handed to Capt. LeChuck, beause he has a bounty on your heads." The governor tells them. "The reason why I had the crate open was because I figure that you two are probably starving from your long journey."

Vexen scowls, whereas Marluxia rolls his eyes at this statement. If he was not handcuff to the senior founder, Mayor Phatt is going to die right now by his own bare hands. The two nobodies are gangly from being inside a crate for so long. Their hair is filled with sweat and rancid stench.

"Now, guard, take our guess to their hotel room." The guard pulls on their voodoo chain and drags them away. The guard is a huge burly man with huge muscles. The man was wearing a Spanish conquistador metal breastplate and helmet.

Marluxia is infuriated. "I will be back! I will _be back_!" He screams as the guard drags them away by their handcuffs.

-Inside Phatt Island jail-

"Stay guard, Walt. I'll return to relive you in a few hours." The jailer tells the hound dog, to whom he hands the keys, and walks away. Now, Walt is a black and brown spotted hound, with a mean guard look to him. He stands outside the jail cell with the keys in his mouth.

The Phatt Island jail is small, compared to the Fort Charles jail in Port Royale world; there are two jail cells, though apparently Vexen and Marluxia's cell are next to a skeletal mate who appears to have been there a lot longer than they. At the far corner there is a rickety three-legged stool that's under the writing drawer/ miniature bookshelf, where the jailer keeps his knickknacks and oddiments. The floors are made of cobblestones and the only exit is the arch doorway.

"Good thing I have these doggie biscuit in my person." Vexen says as he reaches into his coat pocket. Marluxia found his respect for Vexen rising at the prospect that they are going to get out so soon. The Chilly Academic then wags the small bone shape biscuit through the cell bars, attempting to entice the guard doll to come. "Here, Walty, (whistles)."

Walt approaches, puts down the keys on the floor, and sniffs Vexen's doggie treat. Then he retreats, picks up the keys, and distances himself from the cell.

"Why did he leave?" Marluxia questions.

"Oops, these are the dog biscuits I intend to use on Roy." Vexen explains. "I had two kinds of dog biscuits in my pockets, the ones in my left are drench in a draught that renders the victim unconscious, while the other…Well, Zexion told me to carry the undraught ones, he grounds it and puts it into the food that Saïx consumes." Marluxia thought that last month's salad with dry bacon bits tasted a bit odd, but Saïx and Xemnas are suckers for Zexion's cooking. That explains why the Chily Academic gets to experiment on the Lunar Diviner and the Superior half of the time. Kaya winces at the thought.

"Roy is a dog that has keys in his mouth, too, but he was found in the Port Royale world. I intend to bring him to Never Was for experimentation," The Graceful Assassin hears his mentor explain.

Marluxia sighs, exasperated. "Right."

"I never met Roy, but I read of him in our reports whenever a member ends up behind bars."

-3PM-

The temperature rises underneath the afternoon sun. The burly jailer came and sat down on his chair. "Hey, Walt, you can go now." The hound gives him the keys. The dog then leaves, Marluxia then watches as the happy pooch darts out the door, how he wishes that it where him instead - free of being a jailbird, and free of being handcuff to Vexen.


	3. Chapter III, The Jailbreak Scheme

Chapter III. The Jailbreak Scheme.

**Muarry: Bwahahaha, the authoress does not own anything but the idea and the ocs.**

The afternoon turns to evening, which will eventually turn to night. Marluxia thinks silently,_ Captain LeChuck will be here as soon as the sun sets,_ he assumes._ Also, it will be difficult to travel through the Corridor of Darkness with a sleeping Vexen handcuffed to me. There's also the fact that Walt, the guard dog, will begin barking like crazy, awakening the sleeping grog-swilling guard in the process._

"Hey, Vexen, wake up." Marluxia uses his free hand to shake Vexen's shoulder.

The chemist moans. "What?"

"I have an idea."

-Later-

"Wake up, Sleeping Beauties!" roars the jailer as he fumbles with the keys.

Eventually, "After them, I need them to find my bride!" roars the undead pirate corpse captain. Vexen ices the skeletal pirates, while Marluxia charges with his scythe in hand, impaling anyone in his way. "Send us a postcard of the first honeymoon, you bag of bones!" Vexen shouts back, the two nobodies make their way to the pier, which is a stone's throw from where they are.

"Hey, wait! I'm Elaine Marley's secretary!" Marluxia cries out to the lady boat captain. Bullets whiz by. This is Captain Kate Capsize, and she owns the glass bottom boat, as well as touring service.

"How much are you willing to pay, government secretary?" shouts Captain Kate Capsize above the barrage of gunfire. Kate Capsize is a red haired woman, who has experience at sailing and ferrying people across the islands. Her overblown blue hat matches her coat, while the brown boots cause anyone to wonder what her shoe size is.

"Enough to cover any damages caused by us!" Marluxia hasty tells her, as he and Vexen boarded the boat.

She revs up the engine and sails off with her two passengers.


	4. Chapter IV, The Wonderful Carribean Sea

Chapter IV- The Wonderful Caribbean Sea

**Roxas: What is presented here, especially the characters, is not owned by the authoress in any way, shape, or form. Only the idea and OCs. Last but not least, beta-reader credits to Princess of Rose.**

"So, you are an intern, Mr. –" Kate then asks, while steering the boat. Marluxia decides to show off his charms by smiling at her and using his huge vocabulary, if he must. He has learned how to make ladies swoon and go his way from Luxord, the Order's resident spy…Even though the lessons are brief.

"The name's Cath. Bob Cath," The Graceful Assassin purrs seductively at her from his seat. "Yes, I had a sheltered experience and lived in Melee Island, Kate." He unzips his black coat to show her his abs (It works for Luxord, so why not?). "You are as beautiful as the Caribbean Sea. Your fragrance matches the salty air in its exquisiteness."

Vexen then begins thinking about how to drag this hale neophyte into his lab…if they managed to survive. Most of Organization Thirteen had scars on their torsos. Except for the newest neophytes, one can see where the older members, like Xigbar, Lexeaus, and even Xemnas had stitches running all over their torsos.

While Kate Capsize is focus 90% of her concentration on driving and keeping an eye on the unpredictable sea, she can see both Marluxia and Vexen through her rearview mirror sitting there on the passenger seats. Letting out a sigh, she says, "Listen, I have a lot of jealous suitors, so I am booked. Lastly, I'm not dating any man girlier than me or your friend blondie over there."

Marluxia zips up his cloak while Vexen begins to smirk. The smirk evolves into huge laughter. "_Hahahahahahahaha_!"

4/11

"I wish that young Master Amano where here," Vexen moans. This is the first time that Marluxia had ever heard of the senior member missing anyone in the order, usually he complains about the apparent "stupidity" of Xigbar, Xaloneki, Demyx, and sometimes even Zexion, Luxord, or Saïx, if he wants to have a say of anyone younger than he or of lower rank that he.

"Who is this Amano person?" Marluxia then asks.

"Oh, Roxas Amano, the Key of Destiny. Number Thirteen. He is one of those reckless neophytes that never respect me, Marluxia. Ironically, he expressed a keen interest in becoming my lab assistant and learning some handy ice spells after his recruitment."

"What was he like, Vexen?"

"Oh, he reminds me ever so much of my son, Dar-an. He's full of life and animated, just like Roxas." The Chilly Academic begins to rub his hands. "Also he has a desire to follow in my footsteps and becoming an ice mage, unlike young Roxas, who does not want to be too icy for his comfort."

"He's a neophyte, and yet you speak highly of him, Vexen." Marluxia is a bit skeptical, this is too good to be true; usually Vexen insults everyone in Organization XIII (Except Xemnas) that has a lower rank than he.

"Yes, I can count on him, regardless of the fact that he has that brainless Flurry of Dancing Flames as a teacher and friend…Maybe some of Roxas's respect for me will rub off on him." Vexen spits out Axel's name in sheer disgust, as though somebody fed him moldy cheese.

Meanwhile at the Twilight Town clock tower, Roxas, Axel, and Luxord are sitting at the usual spot where they usually hang out when they eat sea salt ice cream. "I don't want to end up like another Dar-an…" Roxas tells his Nobody peers as he licks his ice cream.

"Who?" Axel asks.

"Vexen's son, Dar-an. When Vexen had a heart, he was married to the love of his life, Undwari."

"BELUGH!" Axel makes a face; he does not like the pale skin blonde. Now he must be induced with the guy's life story.

"Oh, Vexen Jr. was one of the first casualties of Xemnas, I mean when he was one of Xehonart's experiments. At the time, they didn't know it was going to be that deadly. He died fading away while holding onto his Dad's hand and his Mom watching, since she was a lab assistant."

"I daresay, this files under the rank of divorce." Luxord shudders. Axel nods. He knew that Roxas talked to both him and the Gambler of Fate into joining him in one of the missions, but knowing it was Count Vex-ula's idea puts him ill at ease. He rather ended up being pursued by the creepy freaky face, Xaloneki. Now this Nobody, whose hair is uncontrollably messy and is held by a green scrunchy, has been stalking both him and Saïx for a date…but she's only fourteen years old.


	5. Chapter V, The Prequel Scene

Chapter V, The Prequel Scene

A/N: Thanks for Princess of Rose for beta reading.

"**Hold it. I bet you all are wondering, how in the world did Vexen and Luxord's espionage student end up handcuffs?" Roxas stops the fic with the magic clicker. Axel steps out of a Corridor of Darkness, "Who cares? It's not Marly's fault that he's handcuffed to Dr. Frankenstein's vampire's sister's son, who's a nobody with no life at all, and who is getting ideas to strap him to the operation table to tinker with his innards as if they are clogs and wheels."**

"**The readers would like to know, Axel." Roxas rewinds the fic to a scene that happened earlier, before Vexen and Marluxia ship themselves out of LeChuck's grand resort island.**

"I have a bad feeling about this, Vexen." Marluxia's blue eyes stare at their surroundings; the island is a gravesite, filled with bones, graves, torture implements of the cartoon variety, and voodoo of the unfriendly cartoon variety. Marluxia, being bored, decided to read some of the grave stones' epitaphs. "I was somebody. Who? Is no business of yours." Other reads, 'Dara Bow was a reporter, went to the museum to cover a story, ended up killed after the Gala.' Marluxia covers his mouth in a light glee, "I wonder what happened to her." 'The owlish Professor Zei searched for the library. Nobody gives him a HOOT!' His eyes caught another one, "De I. Dara, who went out with an artistic BANG."

"Marluxia, come along, the wonderful specimen should be around here somewhere," Vexen calls out.

"Coming." What Marluxia notices is that the epitaphs are actually a bit more fun to read than helping the chemist Nobody, because the sayings are humorous, ironic, or amusing if not funny. But he cannot help but think that they are on the wrong island.

'''Here lies Sam, the Chaser, who died with a key to his heart,'" Marluxia reads before he hurries off to catches up with Vexen, who is at the far side of the graveyard.

"Now all we must do is find a place that sells bananas and use it as bait," Vexen tells him. He has his net ready to capture the creature. It's a special net. No living being can teleport out of it, even if it uses the Corridor of Darkness. Organization Thirteen uses these nets and many similar gadgets to capture Heartless and lesser Nobodies.

Suddenly, undead skeletons that wore ridiculous hats, swimming pool toy inner tubes, and wield cutlasses and pistols surrounded them all.

"_No, I'm a scientist!_" Screams Vexen. He currently wishes that it is Roxas instead of Marluxia that was his mission partner, because the fourteen year old knows exactly what to do in a situation like this: summon up his Keyblade, hack 'n' slash, whereas the Chilly Academic runs to hide.

Not Marluxia- though he had his scythe out just in case. His partner is intending to abandon the burly neophyte to whatever fate these undead have in store for them.

"ARRRGGHHH, who what we be havin'?" The leader then shows up. He's actually a rotting corpse, dressed in a scarlet jacket and wearing a hat befitting a pirate captain. If it weren't for the fact that this pirate captain is decomposing, complete with flies buzzing around him as well as the awful stench, he looks pretty decent as far as a black bearded undead. This is the dread pirate Captain LeChuck. "So, ye be a pair of scientists, says ye."

Vexen nods rapidly, "I even have the degrees to show it, Pirate Captain, Sir."

"Ye can be of some use." LeChuck smiles a toothy grin at Vexen. Next, he shouts orders- "Lock the scientist and his lab assistant up in my getaway vacation lair!"

Later, Murray came in the moldy lab and handcuffed the two Nobodies together. LeChuck's vacation castle is actually a fortress filled with traps, locks, and evil dungeons. "_Mwahahahahaha, fear my evil_!"

"Your evil what?" Marluxia rolls his blue eyes. The handcuffs appear on his wrist attaching him to Vexen, who was fiddling with its screw to separate himself from who he considers the worst member in Organization Thirteen.

"Oh, I haven't thought of that…Frankly," The skeleton then muses, stroking his own chin. Murray is wearing a scarlet cape with a skull pin. Also, he has a dragon inner tube around his waist, and a belt that holds his scabbard. "_Bwahahahaha_, this is the Voodoo Handcuff of Hell 2001. If you tried to unlock it there will be a cursed placed on you that is ever so evil that it makes Beelzebub laugh his heart out, _mwahahahaha_!"

Vexen offers a sarcastic comment, "Oh my, I am so scared that my knees are knocking to mess up the Richter scale." The blonde and his pink haired companion are not afraid of Murray at all.

Murray places his bony hand on the Chilly Academic's shoulder, "Am I that scary? I must be omnipotent!" He laughs evilly once more.

"Why did you join, LeChuck? You can make it out on your own." Marluxia says.

"Yeah, true I can, though I'm here for the ride, and for the fun of it." Murray tells them. "My ambition is to spread evil across the Caribbean!"

**Roxas stops the fic with the remote, "There you have it. That is the story of why Vexen and Marluxia are handcuffed together." **

**Luxord is tying an imaginary screw to his head. "That skeletal chap is just as frightening as a key chain." Axel nods in agreement.**

AN: The epitaph 'I was somebody' is an actual epitaph from Stowe, Vermont. And thanks _**auragonian**_ for reviewing.


	6. Chapter VI, Plunder Island

Chapter VI- Plunder Island

A/N: Thanks for Princess of Rose for beta reading.

Vexen wakes up to find clouds and a clear blue night hanging overhead. Meanwhile, Marluxia is lying beside him. They both are on a sandy beach. He sees Vexen's awake.

"Hello Rip Van Winkle. We're on another island." Unlike the island LeChuck calls his vacation island, this one has living creatures, feral chicken, plants, and people, all neither dead nor decaying, plus there is not a gravestone in sight. The Graceful Assassin notices that the older man is rubbing his groggy eyes.

"How did we escape, Eleven?"

"Oh, Kate just dropped us off here, Vexen. She's on to me. She thinks that I'm lying about being a government intern." Marluxia is more worried about blowing their cover.

"You are, Eleven." The Chilly Academic assumes that his companion is using the government intern story as an alias as well.

"Let's go back to sleep."

"I'm way ahead of you." Vexen immediately makes himself comfortable on the beach and falls asleep.

4/11

**In Phatt Island, **

Captain LeChuck is in the governor's mansion, screaming at Governor Phatt and his guard. When he comes out, he then roars at Largo de Grande and his skeletal crew. "Search everywhere in the island for those two scientists, especially Governor Elaine Marley! Arrrggghhhhh!"

They all shudder and quiver as they disperse. The governor breathes a sigh of relief once his guest and the undead crew leave his mansion.

"Soon, I'll have the money to purchase the most extravagant wedding for my dear sweet Elaine." Captain LeChuck then tells his crew once they step out of the mansion. "After I transform her into my undead bride, that is."

"You summon me, my liege?" Murray appears at his side. He is a bit flamboyant for a walking skeleton wearing nothing but belts that hold a scabbard and a cutlass, and an inflatable tube with a funny dragon, which snarls.

"Yes, Murray. I want you to find the place that has the largest diamond ring in the history of diamond rings. It is part of my plan."

"Precisely, my liege." Muarry exits LeChuck's ship through a Corridors of Darkness.


	7. Chapter VII, The Welcoming Committee

Chapter VII- The Welcoming Committee

Muarry: Credits to Princess of Rose for the beta reading, Mwahahahahahaha!

**Roxas (eyes rolling): About time to you showed up.**

Lexaeus finds both Marluxia and Vexen on the small beach, the waves of Plunder Island lapping at their feet. Demyx gazes on as the gentle giant carries Vexen over his shoulder. They notice that their colleagues were exhausted and hungry from being in a crate for so long. It is so easy for the Silent Hero to do this and carry Marluxia with his free hand.

"Welcome to Plunder Island, guys," The Melodious Nocturne greets them.

"Vexen, we got here as soon as I received your call." Lexaeus tells them. The nearby Fort Chewbacca overlooks the beach from the distance; the palm trees, ferns, and the native feral chicken are growing in abundance and around them. "Bawk, bawk, bawk!" The cool breeze comes from the ocean and brings in freshness and a romantic salty taste.

"Come, your questions will be answered in due time," Lexaeus continues. Vexen opens his mouth in protest, but decided against it. "There are spies of the Dark Pirate Lord all around."

Emo Sob Story Motel is a little hotel that is nestling in the district beyond the clock tower and the Field of Honor. Lexaeus leads them inside, while Demyx is yakking his head off about the Melee Island world's inhabitants, plants, animals, and geography.

The Emo Sob Story Motel is very gothic and depressing to look at. The draperies are black, the music of despair is playing softly in the radio, and most of its residents are all using umbrellas to shield them from the sunlight. It makes one wonder if the Silent Hero and the Melodious Nocturne are harboring suicidal thoughts and want to live in the darkness for all eternality.

"Hi, Hot Buns." The motel's clerk smiles as he approaches the desk.

"Hello, yourself, Mrs. Eloise Bammernvt." Eloise is a lady about in her late fifties; she is the ever-happy motel clerk that apparently loves her job. She is wearing a dress that is drably colored in green and brown. Her apron is off white. "I have some friends that are searching for lodging, Bammernvt." Lexaeus leans an elbow on the desk and winks seductively at her. "Your looks are as refreshing as the ocean breeze."

Marluxia almost threw up, whereas Vexen screams, "Five, I'll kill you!" Lexaeus hands them the keys to their rooms.

"At least I'll have my own room." Marluxia is resisting the urge to punch his teacher where he now stands. He would have gone to find his room but the handcuffs tether him firmly to his unpleasant teacher. The Graceful Assassin disappointedly groans at the realization.

"Oh, Snuggles, I know you know your way around the rooms." She waves at them. Demyx and Lexaeus lead their fellow Organization Thirteen members to their rooms, Rooms 283 and 292.

"I'll return the other keys, gentlemen." Lexaeus tells them. Marluxia stares hard at him, trying to figure out if his mentor knows if he is handcuffed to Vexen or not.

That evening, the small party of Nobodies held a meeting. "Lexaeus, now why can't I go with you on your mission?" Marluxia tells him, his wrist aches and is numb from the metal. He and Vexen are sitting on the bed, which has black covers.

"Marluxia, one of the reasons why is because the Superior wants to knock your ego down a few notches."

Vexen harrumphs, crossing his arms across his chest. "By the way, why are you here, Number Five?"

"Organization Thirteen has been eying this world, Vexen. Merely because of its strange voodoo and cartoon-ish properties. We want to spread the darkness to this world. But there is a thorn on our side."

"It's Captain He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named-Currently-And-Has-Been-Resurrected-Somehow," Demyx answers, not wanting to be left out of the conversation.

"Yes, _him_," Lexaeus continues the meeting. "Now He is already on the way to spreading darkness throughout the Caribbean. He has control over the Heartless- I know what you are thinking, he is not part of the late Maleficent's Hell Fire Club, even though we know she would love to have him in her group. If the pirate zombie is successful in taking over, it will interfere with our plans to conduct experiments on the heart, and we cannot allow that. This is why I am present, to counteract this, while you guys go forth to find the three-headed monkey."

"Sifu Lexy," Marluxia solemnly addresses him. "Since you are on this important mission to counteract this guy, then who is going to assist me and Vexen on our mission?"

"That's why I bought along Demyx. Of course I could've brought in a capable person, like Saïx, for the job. But he was the only one who was assigned on the surveying mission besides me. He knows about the inhabitants and the strange goings of this world." Lexaeus pauses. "Oh, and bye the way, Marluxia, it's 'Vexen and I,' not 'me and Vexen'."

4/11

"Good night," Marluxia and Vexen heard Demyx and Lexaeus telling them. The two Nobodies sat on the bench overlooking the small city of Puerto Pollo at the Field of Honor.

"I don't think I'm experienced for the job, Sifu Lexy." Demyx tells him. The lovely full moon is shining on the island. "I like this place, but I'm still nervous about being their only life line."

"Demyx, you are capable. They don't know how the demographics and the unusual customs of the locals work, you experienced that." Lexaeus looks at the sky. "But my main concern is Vexen. He hates the Wonderland world, how much more is it with this place? He is fit to be sent to Port Royal – The one that has Captain Jack Sparrow – He even studied beforehand to go there."

"Other than that, he got paired with an AB guy. They're evil."

Lexaeus shakes his head and smiles at the younger Nobody, "Not necessarily, Demyx. Marluxia is just a loose cannon, he plans, yet many of these plans are way over his league because he does not think of a foundation to support said plans."

"So where do I come in?"

"You are the 'Help Guy' to assist them in anyway possible, until they find this wonderful specimen. While I work to make sure that Captain LeChuck does not succeed. Not to worry, this is just another surveying mission for me; I'll send others once I returned to the World That Never Was." Demyx gives him a nervous smile. "Remember, you can always call us for an extra hand, even the Superior or Roxas."

"No, not Roxas. He's Vexen Jr. That kid is so scientific I come to believe that he and Vexen are related. Why cannot I call Xaloneki?"

"Easy, Demyx. Roxas is still the new guy and has not recovered from his amnesia; he only latches on his mentor-friends because he is still learning behavior. We are still studying young Xaloneki. Larxene told me that she has not learned the ropes." Both Lexaeus and Demyx made faces; they are both disturbed of what the Toxic Geisha might be going through Larxene's definition of "the ropes." They rightly conclude that it probably involves lessons on how to kick men were it hurts, evil laughter, Marquis de Sade readings, and elemental lessons, where clearly the Savage Nymph does not miss.

"Speaking of Larxene, have you been practicing your blood manipulation techniques, Nine? You know that the Superior wants you to improve."

Demyx sighs. Lexaeus only calls them by number when he is annoyed with them. "Yes, I have been practicing with the water filled dummies. But Lexaeus, I don't like it that much. It feels that it goes against my nature." The Silent Hero gives him a solemn look, ever since Demyx and Hidan were paired together on a mission, which resulted in Hidan joining the Akatsuki and the Melodious Nocturne unlocking a new ability.

"I'll give you another reason for you to practice it, Demyx. Vexen likes to do it. He can see the advantages on getting unwilling members in his lab for experimentation. Knowing you, I know you would not like to be forced to go in there."

"Dude, that's like a violation of my body," The Melodious Nocturne protests aloud.

"I think both Vexen and Hidan love the feeling of feeling the victim's heart thumping and them extracting power over said victim."

"No wonder why Vexen follows the calendar- for when the full moon appears and when it will appear in so-and-so world." Demyx shudders. A black cat approaches them; the Melodious Nocturne picks it up. "Oh, Yoruichi, it's you. I hope you are not getting in trouble with some ghoul kids."

"I don't like Yoruichi. Secondly, of all there are many cultures that state that felines, especially the black cats, are unlucky, Demyx." Lexaeus never did like the mascot of the Plunder Island Naturalist Society. He suspects that the cat has strange magic prosperities align with the light.

"No, Sifu Lexaeus, your scientific buddies told and even convinced me that Yoruichi, the black cat, is a walking mass of blessed fortune and goodness."

Lexaeus smiles and shakes his head. "That's what I'm worried about, Demyx."

(A note from the beta reader: According to wikipedia, 'Sifu' is the Chinese character for 'master' or 'teacher.')


	8. Chapter VIII, A Good Night Sleep

Chapter VIII- A Good Night Sleep

**Muarry: Credits to Princess of Rose for beta reading, and lastly, the Authoress does not own anything except the OCs and the idea…And the EVIL-ness.**

**Roxas: There's no evil.**

"Vexen, I can't sleep," Marluxia moans in bed. Vexen is also wide-awake as well, since they cannot roll in bed because of the magical cuffs. "_Bawk, bawk_!" The other reason why Four and Eleven cannot fall asleep is because of the chickens and monkeys outside, which were all making a ruckus. "_Ack_! _Eep_! _Oop_!" "_Bawk_!"

"If I weren't handcuffed, I'd go out there and put a silence to this insidious racket," snaps the blonde. He grabs his pillow, using it to cover his ears to muffle out the noise.

"_Oooo_! _Eek_! _Ack_!" The monkeys and feral chickens are having a party that night. Of course, most of the human residents are sound asleep, since they are used to the screeching contest between Plunder Island's most exclusive creatures. "_Bawk_, _bawk_!" "_Aaahhhh_! _Eeeek_! _Aaahhhh_!"

"_Oooeeee_!"

4/11

"Oh, Good morning, Vexen. And my 'favorite' hotheaded student," Lexaeus greets the Chilly Academic and the pink-haired Graceful Assassin. The sun is rising and Mrs. Bammernvt enters in the room with their breakfast.

"_Good marrow_!" She screams, and then her group of friends enters the room and began playing mariachi music. Demyx watches in mortified horror. He knows that the senior water manipulator has quite a temper.

"_Lexaeus_!" Screams Vexen at the top of his lungs, now fully awake.

"What?" Lexaeus smiles mischievously.

-A few minutes later-

Marluxia and Vexen are up. They are still groggy, red-eyed, and sleepy as they sit on a very expensive black velvet couch. Lexaeus and Demyx brief them about this world. "Now here is the Plunder Island tourism map, there is the Naturalist Society, just mention that you're friends of mine." The Silent Hero was explaining and using dioramas for visual aid. "You can also call Demyx, while you guys are here. He was stationed in this world for your convenience." The two sleepy-eyed Nobodies only hear half of what Lexaeus is telling them, but they are wondering- how did both Demyx and Lexaeus manage to sleep through the whole chicken-and-monkey screeching fest?

"Superior, can I leave now for a gig with some buds of mine, please?" Demyx pleads, even using puppy eyes at the earth user, then Lexaeus nods. The Melodious Nocturne steps into the Corridor of Darkness with a loud, "_Whoopie_!"

"This is going to be bad, isn't it?" Vexen adds, doubting his fellow founding member's sanity and choice of a supervisor for Operation: The Three-Headed Monkey.

"Now, Vexen there's someone in PINS that…" But the two Nobodies are half asleep when Lexaeus is explaining the locals.


	9. Chapter IX, Aliases

Chapter IX- Aliases

Roxas: Credits to Princess of Rose for beta-editing.

Plunder Island is a wonderful island. It is the home of various forms of wildlife; especially the native feral chickens and the ipecac flower, which syrup can cause one to throw up. The area leading away from the mighty Fort Chewbacca (Ft. Chewie for short) leads deep into the jungle where the mysterious ship got thrown into the nearby swamp, and became the home base for Voodoo an' Things.

When one goes through the village, he will encounter Blondebeard's chicken shop, which is a chicken restaurant. Another pathway behind the restaurant leads to Danjer Cove, but that path leading to there be dangerous because of the jungle and its inhabitants.

Downtown has the Long John Silver Center for the Performing Arts theater, where Slappy Cromwell does his performances. This is where Vexen and Marluxia are hiding, and are hoping for some entertainment while they are exploring the island. "That's the worst play ever! The Bard is obliviously rolling in his grave and cursing by now!" Vexen gags.

He and the Graceful Assassin are already making their way to the exit. What Slappy attempted to do in his play was to rewrite William Shakespeare's plays into a forty-five minute production, and add cannonball juggling in the process. In Vexen and Marluxia's opinion, the actor must be taken out to the street and be shot! Marluxia has never even seen any of William Shakespeare's plays, but he knows that Cromwell's version is horrible.

"Oh, my good gentlemen, please, come again for another exciting performance of 'Speare!'" Slappy slaps Eleven's back. "By the way, there is a Plunder Island Naturalist Society beyond the barber shop. That's where the political fraction an' the rich reside in." It took the entirety of the Nobody's energy to not swing the Graceful Dahlia at the thespian.

"Yes!" Shouts Vexen gleefully, arms raised into the air. "Why are you telling us this, Mr. Cromwell?"

"Well, because you look like a scientist. Mr. –"

"Malcom, Ian Malcom," Vexen gives his alias. Marluxia rolls his eyes, he vaguely remembers Lexaeus saying something about PINS, but he was too sleepy at the time.

Minutes later, the two Organization Thirteen members follow the directions to find the Naturalist Society. Vexen is hopping and skipping along the way, ignoring the fact that both he and Marluxia's wrists are now in pain, red and numb.

"Just think, Eleven. I'm going to be with people of a similar mindset, not with the likes of those incompetent morons of Phatt Island."

"Whatever you say, _Dr. Malcom_," Marluxia sarcastically says. The Caribbean sun beats down on their heads. If only he can remember what Lexaeus told him (and Vexen) about the Plunder Island Naturalist Society. The Graceful Assassin only foggily remembers of what the senior member told both he and Vexen.

The PINS' headquarters look like England's science institution, but instead of two Union Jacks drapes proudly above the entrance way for all to see, it has two flags, one is the Melee Island Tri-Island flag with a monkey insignia while the other is a Jolly Roger.

"Wow, I feel as if I regained my heart," Squeals Vexen. This is a sight that Marluxia wishes that he never would witness it again.

"Whoo, hoo," The Graceful Assassin says without enthusiasm, knowing that Luxord and Roxas were not lying about Vexen's 'Experiment on anything that breathes' mentality. He's prepared to see the interior similar to Frankenstein's laboratory, except it's not in the basement.

Upon entering, a sight met their eyes; there is a huge globe at the center of the visitor's lobby. Underneath it are benches for one to rest their weary legs; to the far right are the information booths that sells brochures, magazines, and water bottles. Though as far as anyone is concern, the place appears like a museum.

"Hey," Marluxia exclaims as a black cat brushes herself against his boots.


	10. Chapter X, The PINS

Chapter X- The Plunder Island Naturalist Society

Roxas: Credits to Princess of Rose for beta-editing and remember the Authoress does not own except the ocs and idea.

"Oh, this is Yoruichi. I think she likes you." Uther Rokubi picks up the feline.

Uther is a brown haired young man who is about twenty-two years old. His hair is messy and covers one half of his face. This reminds Vexen and Marluxia of Zexion. He wears a loose fitting blue jacket that reveals his chest, and his breeches used to be white, but thanks to constant expeditions they are now a light tan color. The white stockings fair no better and his buckle shoes are now holey. While Uther Rokubi is observing the two Nobodies, his expression is stoic.

"Uther, you sluggard, you forgot your apron." A young woman, approximately twenty years old came out of the museum store. She appears Chinese, but it is a bit difficult to tell what her nationality used to be because she got a tan that made her skin a bit dark. Also she bore the scar of a nasty burn that runs down the left side of her neck. Her clothes cover it. She wears a dirty pink bodice that covers her shirt. Her breeches and stockings are also mud caked, her clothes are hidden by the apron that she wears, which bores the Plunder Island Naturalist Society's logo. Her explorer's hat covers her black hair.

One look at Vexen, she darts back inside the museum store giggling uncontrollably.

Uther gives the two Nobodies a nasty glare, mainly at the blonde, "Stay away from my girl if you know what is best for you."

Vexen almost jumps into Marluxia's arms when an older man approaches them. He wore a scarlet cotton scarf that hangs loose around his shoulders, and like Rokubi, he wears some 17th century clothes. His Hawaiian shirt has cherry blossoms and other tropical flowers that represent death. This explains the chemist Nobody's reactions. The man bores uncanny resemblance to Ansem the Wise! Although it's easier to see that this man is about in his early thirties, with the long blonde hair and the beard, and that this guy has dark green eyes and fits more with the local inhabitants. Not to mention, he smiles more.

Marluxia then says, "Hi, we are a bit at a lost here."

"Oh, welcome to the Plunder Island Naturalist Society, gentlemen. I'm Professor Anwell Maverick. Here we preserve the science for all. I hope young Uther Rokubi did not scare you. He is quite protective of his female friend, even though he acts like an emotionless and anti-social git. Now if it wasn't for Lauretta, Yoruichi would have been in the animal hospital for life." Anwell leads them to the information booth, where he pulls up the brochures to show the two nobodies.

"Oh, what happened to her?"

"She stupidly put a firecracker in her pocket to save the cat from a bunch of creepy ghoul kids when she was ten years old."

"That's foolish." Vexen remarks wondering,_ "How do those with hearts think, why those antics? A good thing about a lack of heart is one does not do much foolishness."_

"It exploded before she can throw it out to sea. Now what can I do for you two gentlemen? Be careful, here in the Naturalist Society, the women used to outnumber us men. But for the sake of science most of the ladies encounter ghastly fates." Anwell lowers his voice. "I believe that it is the curse of El Pollo Diablo."

"There is no 'El Pollo Diablo'!" Vexen raises his voice. He had always known that Ansem the Wise was always a fool, his Melee Island ditzy counterpart is no better, and both are a disgrace to science in his opinion.

"My good gentleman and fellow scientist, prove it!" Anwell lays down the proverbial gauntlet. Marluxia is whining, "Vexen, we have no time for this!" But the two older men ignored him.

"Maverick, don't you dare start something up!" A strawberry blonde-haired lady, who is a bit older than Anwell, came to break up the fight. This is Professor Marcelina Brinestoop. She wears khaki pants, a dirty white shirt (it used to be white, but it's been weather beaten), a brown leather jacket, and a brown fedora hat.

"Too late, Sensei, I already did." Anwell smiles at Professor Brinestoop.

"I see you met my student, Maverick. Careful, he causes a lot of commotion."


	11. Chapter XI, Introductions

Chapter XI, Introductions

A few hours later, Vexen and Marluxia had an audience with all the respective heads of the science community. The debate room is a huge auditorium which can seat two hundred, except it is mostly empty, save for Slappy Cromwell and Capt. Blondebeard, who arrived. Anwell cheerfully introduces the two Nobodies as "Dr. Ian Malcom" and "Dr. Nigel Thornberry." "Now members of the scientific community applaud and welcome our fellow members of science."

All of the respected members of the Plunder Island Naturalist society give rousing applaud, they are dressed up in formal wears, and have tans, thus proving that the scientists spend time a lot outside in the Caribbean sun. Vexen and Marluxia can only gape in surprise! Those that are considered as Plunder Island Naturalist most esteemed members are not what the blonde and the bushy pink haired Nobody expected, "WHAT?" Exclaimed Vexen, pointing at the pink haired eight year old that's wearing a brown ball gown that has an over abundance of glitter and sequences, there's so much glitter and sequences that it causes eye sores to whomever stares at her dress. Uther and Boris can be seen covering their eyes and not staring at her directly.

"Yes, Professor Ian Malcom." Anwell says nonchalantly. "Oh, that's Yvette Smith, a child genius, and like Lauretta Dinglehop, she is a horrible dresser."

"But a mere child cannot understand the complexities of the scientific process, Dr. Anwell Maverick!" Vexen then points at Lauretta and Uther, the young couple are seated next to each other much to the exasperations of Boris Gondor. "Those two appear like they just came out of the juvenile delinquent jail or worst, the video game arcade!" Lauretta begins to make puppy dog eyes enough to rival Demyx, "What's wrong with video games, Sir?" Both of Uther and Lauretta's hair appears as though they did not comb it, regardless of the fact that they are dressed well for the occasion. "That man appears as if he came out of a high fantasy novel whose character was messed up in a movie." Boris Gondor's costume is more fitted for the 'Lord of the Rings' cosplay convention as Boromir. He already has grown the scurfy brown beard and his hair already goes to the back of his neck. "But do you know how much money I must used to purchase a real broad sword and authentic shield at XoverBay? This is perfect for dicing up the niece's suitors who have a personality of a log and spend the whole afternoons blowing bubbles." Uther Rokubi moves to the empty seat that's next to his old seat.

"Those that you see are just so happens to be what's left of us, Dr. Malcom and Thornberry." Anwell coughs. "We have our depressing life stories of how we lost love ones through He-Who-Should-Not-Be-Named-Currently and El Pollo Diablo. For the sake of the advancement of science, we are so dedicated to our job, our calling, and placing signs that contained information for the less informed. Professor Delvin Droll. PhD of Lucre Island University lost his beloved and fellow bio-botanist to at a solo expedition; he suspects that Heartlesses must have killed her – Which is why he is wearing an Organization Thirteen black coat constantly. His students are Drake Mallenpop and Henry Rotter." Both are young seventeen year olds, except Henry, has messy dark brown hair and blue eyes, he wears glasses and his 18th century clothes are just as messy as his hair, he has a family history connecting him to the inventor of grog. His like-minded friend, Drake Mallenpop, is the son of Plunder Island's governor. His blonde hair is the lightest shade of blonde anyone's ever seen, his aristocratic clothes: down to his breeches are weatherbeaten. Both wore snake-like smiles.

"Yvette Smith lost Leonard Zarakistone through mist of Blood Island – He believed that the tourism should be expanded to the other islands." Every one of the PINS members are crying and dabbing their eyes with their hankerchiefs.

"So do you have a ludicrous sob story, Vexen? Or do you act insane like these self-proclaim scientists." Marluxia then asks the senior Organization Thirteen member. The poor neophyte did not say his thoughts aloud, but he assumes that there is something a bit off about the Plunder Island Naturalist Society and secondly, the name acronym spells 'PINS.' Vexen rolls his eyes, he is determined to prove once and for all that 'El Pollo Diablo' does not exist.

"Why are you guys dressed in black?" Lauretta raises her hand, Vexen and Marluxia only stare at her not answering her seemingly innocent question. The Chilly Academic concludes that she has a right to ask that question, since everyone in this world knows that black absorbs heat.

NoteTrap, the 'Note-taking Oceanic Terrain Expedition Tracker Rescue Appartaus and Pirate's log, the group's anti-gravity android then speaks in a human voice. "Sir, ladies, and gentlemen, you forgotten Dr. Antonia Another, the zoologist/naturalist/perky goth of our illustrious group."

Mrs. Brinestoop intervenes, "Oh, we think that she is alive. It's difficult to determine if she is dead or not." She arranges her ear microphone and steps up to the podium. "Now that the introductions of the leading members of the scientific community are already mention. Our late members would want us to conduct and go forth where we had not gone before. I am Mrs. Brinestoop, the leader of the group (Sorry, Anwell, you're coy by two years)."


	12. Chapter XII, The Cellular Phone Call

Chapter XII, The Cellular Phone Call

"_Lexaeus Ishimoto_!" Vexen screams into his cellular phone, the only time when Organization Thirteen calls each other by their surnames is in grave and serious matters. "You did not tell me about Ansem the Wise's younger separated from birth twin!...What do you mean? The way I see it, it's Hollow Bastion all over again!"

The Silent Hero steps out of the Corridors of Darkness, "Oh, Vexen Adachi, I cerebrate that I elucidated about the Plunder Island Naturalist Society that there's someone that bores the same likeness as the former king of Hollow Bastion. I met him on the Thirteenth Order's first surveying mission to this world; I was a bit stupefaction at his existence. Since during that time, I thought Ansem the Wise escaped the Realm of Nothingness, suffered amnesia, and consumed a few de-aging pills. But this is just a real native conceived with his likeness. However Anwell-" The Silent Hero's blue eyes widen in shock. He began to question, "Were you rob? Maverick is a pirate, he pickpockets anyone that appears like a sucker in his point of view! PINS may be our allies, but they can and will steal anything they set their eyes upon!"

Both Four and Eleven search their own pockets, but their wallets are empty, save for their IDs and important non-munny items.

"It's going to take more than me saying 'Four, be nice.' I've been training the Plunder Island Naturalist Society to also be our Darkness test subjects in the future. They're the plan C – The last resort, if they're strong willed enough to become Nobodies, they'll be the New Organization Thirteen." Lexaeus then explains, next his voice then rises. "You won't believe what I have to do to bring and find teachers to train them how to use the Hollow Bastion magic styles and fighting techniques, I had to bring tutors to the Melee Island world and vice versa!"

"Why, Master Ishimoto?" Marluxia then asks, he remembers that Lexaeus even became Xigbar's slave for two months, just to get the Freeshooter to teach Anwell Maverick in Melee Island (During that time, the Freeshooter can get cranky and irritated if he misses the midnight revealing of the latest josei and shojo at the bookstore). "Why go through all that trouble for this Kelpto-Academic Club?" The other item in Marluxia's mind was_ "What's Plan C? Should they the Plunder Naturalists be "Plan B?"_

"They work together as comrades; therefore I want them as a complete set."

"_Bleah_!" Whines Vexen. "But, Lexaeus, I was only so sleepy, which is why I did not hear you warning me of that Parallel World nitwit!"

"Your loss not mine, Vexy." Marluxia tells him, the Graceful Assassin rolls his eyebrows. He can care less about lookalikes from the two Organization Thirteen founders' past, as long as they are able to achieve their goals.

"It'll be good to exploit their stealing abilities among other expertise, Gentlemen." Lexaeus explains to his colleagues. "Which is why I befriended them, they are the only ones in this world that I know of that have the curiosity of a scientist. In addition, they can go in places where I, you, or the rest of the Thirteenth Order cannot venture at."

The Chilly Academic makes a face of disgust; the thought of Anwell Maverick assisting them spells failure and untrustworthiness to him. As well as the need to get drunk to forget how just how Anwell Maverick reminds him of…A certain someone.

"What? They may be assisting in some of my experiments, but that's just the light work. I did not involve them in anything heavy." Lexaeus shrugs his shoulders at Vexen's disapproval. What the Silent Hero meant by "heavy work," he means the dangerous field work experiments which will instantly cause someone their hearts in a minute. "Master Eleven, just allow some facts to sink into Vexen Adachi's head. I'm afraid he's a bit shock of my pirate associates."

"When will we meet up again, Master Ishimoto?" Marluxia then inquires him. Sadden to see the Silent Hero preparing to leave. "I wanna get uncuff."

"Oh, I just need some items for today's surveying mission, Marluxia. Also, just consult the Mysterious Voodoo Lady for that, she just moved in the swamp." Smiles Lexaeus as he disappears through the Corridors of Darkness. "Bye now."

AN: Hi, guys, I hope that your 4th of July was awesome.

Thanks, auragonian for the reviews.


	13. Chapter XIII,The Tale of El Pollo Diablo

Chapter XIII, El Pollo Diablo

Roxas: Hi, guys, remember Becky does not own anyone recognizable -

Murray: And evil -

Roxas: Only the idea and fan characters. Credits to Princess of Rose for beta-ing this.

In the explorers' ball which is being held in the PINS museum,

"Miss. Lauretta Dinglehop, please, tell us that this is a ghost story for campers to retell for their amusement?" Vexen shakes the twenty-year old woman. The oriental glasses wearing woman can only see dumbly, she enjoys seeing "Dr. Ian Malcom" in her fantasy, filled with bishie sparkles and bubbles.

Dinglehop averts her eyes away from him. "No, it is not. I got relatives and friends that got pecked to death in full gore, plus, explain why the feral chickens are running wild. It is because of her."

Marluxia then asks the one question that's been bothering him. "What is this El Pollo Diablo, Miss. Dinglehop?"

"Good thing you guys came to me, I'm the only one left of the Legendary Animals and Funa Department, plus I memorized most of the myths and urban legends in this island alone. Now El Pollo Diablo aka the Giant Demon Chicken, landed here in Plunder Island many years after its founding." Uther Robuki came to her side, giving a stoic yet angry glare at Vexen and Marluxia, but the story continues. "He's tall as a man, maybe even seven or was that nine feet tall, not to mention his supernatural powers, El Pollo Diablo's massive drumstick legs propels him throughout the jungle as though he were running a race track."

Uther pulls Marluxia's coat cords and says, "On the cold, clear full moon eves. You can hear the bloodcurdling, angry, and bloodthirsty squawk can be heard throughout our island home. The huge chicken from the pits of hell and eyes burning with brimstone flares will wreak vengeance on those who eats her smaller siblings."

"Hahahahaha, can you believe how ridiculous you both sound like?" Vexen laughs. Yvette then says, "The whole town is celebrating your 'Scientific declaration.'" She climbs up on Marluxia, until she is hanging on his shoulder.


	14. Chapter XIV, Parade and Eat Outs

Chapter XIV, The Parade and Eat Outs

Murray: A special thanks to Princess of Rose for her evil services of beta-editing.

Roxas (glares at Murray): Quit it you. Oh, Becky does not own Monkey Island, Kingdom Hearts, its characters, except for the idea.

Murray: Whatever.

All of Plunder Island erupted in celebration that there will be two bold scientists to challenge the view of everyone. Well, that's what Vexen and Marluxia think, in fact, but actually the town's people, they view the two Nobodies as errant knights to scare off, or if possible, kill off the Giant Demon Chicken. Women came out to place leas around the Nobodies's necks; the men shook the two Nobodies' hands and congratulating them on their mission.

Which is why Lauretta and Yvette held the honor of showing them around Puerto Pollo, "Then there's the docks and Ft. Chewie in the distance." Lauretta informs them; both Nobodies notice that both girls take the tour guide role seriously. Vexen can point to what is that statue, landmark, ask questions, and can ask what is she majoring in school and he will get an answer. "So, what made you like that emo-hippie that shouldn't be one of the heads of the scientific community, Miss. Dinglehop?"

"Well, he's nicknamed Lucky Number Six. That's all, a strong navigator if I ever did see." Dinglehop explains, anyone that knows her, she does not want to go into great detail of how grand and wonderful something is, this includes her boyfriend, save those that are close to her.

Marluxia then wonders in silent of what she meant by Uther is 'Lucky Number Six.'

Young Yvette then notices the handcuffs, "Wowsers, those looks like the Voodoo Handcuff of Hell 2001. They say that if anyone tries to unlock it and that person is not the owner of said cuffs, then the three of them will become handcuff monkeys and the rescuer's wrist will be bond by an invisible cord."

"You look like a monkey, Vexen." Marluxia snarks, Vexen glares angrily at him. The last that he wanted to do is de-evolved to a lesser species with Marluxia. "By the way, since when do you know so much about magic, Yvette?"

"Uh, Dr. Boris Gondor's brother, Frederick, married the sister of the Voodoo lady that lives at the swamp. But that's all I know."

"I don't have any knowledge of this thing; all I do is hear of legends. It does not do well since You-Know-What-Horrible-Pirate-That-I-Should-Not-Say-His-Name is back and I don't put it pass him to make something like this." Lauretta exams the handcuffs by touching it, Vexen half expected her to transform into a Heartless, but nothing happens.

"Oh, I see, Captain LeChuck is feared throughout the islands that people are afraid to say his name." Marluxia then says.

Lauretta's face turns white as a sheet of paper. "Don't say his name actually, it's taboo!" Her knees are knocking.

"We also don't take a bath…Some of the risk takers, like Professors Brinestoop and Maverick, do it once in a blue moon." Yvette Smith smiles, she looks around fearing as though Captain LeChuck had his spies lurking.

"Yvette, Laura, saying the name aloud brings fear of the name." Marluxia advises. Lauretta's face flush with a red, even with that advice, she won't say Captain LeChuck's name aloud, the older tour guides will still call him by "You-Know-Who", "He-Who-Should-Not-Be-Name", and some things similar.

"Where are all the young adults and teenagers, guys?"

"Oh, most of them joined He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Name-Currently's demonic skeleton crew. He brainwashed them with propaganda materials that makes it sound cool." Lauretta says. It is only now that the two members of the Thirteenth Order noticed that there are folks of all ages in Plunder Island, but there are no teenagers and young adults, except for Lauretta, her boyfriend, Uther, and anyone associated with the Mojo Lady. "I would have joined out of stupidity and blindness, because of my same age peers. But if it was not for my calling as a scientist and naturalist-in-trainee assistant I would have gone." Vexen and Marluxia knew that it is more than 'science' that cause the young lady to remain in Plunder Island.

The parade ended and the crowd disperses when they arrive at Blondebeard's Chicken Shoppe, Lauretta slips her hand into Vexen's when she saw the abandoned hen coops. "Miss. Dinglehop, let go."

"Is the legend of the Demon Chicken that ingrain in the locals?" Marluxia question Yvette.

"Yes, Dr. Thornberry, it is. We know many people that had been peck violently to death."

Captain Blondebeard hops out of his take out restaurant. "So, when is Miss. Dinglehop goin' ta tie da knot with Master Uther? I wanna witness young love." Captain Blondebeard is an excitable fellow who wears red oven mittens. Lauretta weasels out of Vexen's side and dashes away, returning to the Plunder Island Naturalist Society headquarters. "I wanna see him propose ta her with a huge ring!"

"Ya know that those two are afraid of El Pollo Diablo, Captain Blondebeard." Yvette Smith beams happily; Anwell taps her on the shoulder. "Yo, Yvette, look what I bought from the Kupo creature merchant I met up at the fountain." Anwell is wearing an Organization Thirteen coat, Vexen coughs violently since his saliva went down his windpipe. He is mentally scarred now. It's like seeing Ansem the Wise wearing a black coat. Plus, he must advise Xemnas to command the Nobody moogles never to sell the Darkness repelling coats to non-members, but since these moogles, especially Tanxs, do not have hearts they have a tendency to sell whomever has the munny regardless of the consequences.

"Where did you get that, Professor?" Marluxia asks. He wants to survive this crazy mishap and wants to find out more about this world, he can instantly see that Professor Maverick is a landmine of information, more so than the younger generation of the Plunder Island Naturalist Society.


	15. Chapter XV, The Toxic Geisha

Chapter XV, The Toxic Geisha

The World That Never Was,

Non-Existence Gym,

Xaloneki is punching and kicking the punching bag, it has a crayon drawing of Roxas tape on it. She smiles and wipes the sweat off of her brow, next she pulls back any tan bangs that droops on her face while she is working out.

"Teeter Tot, what are you doing?" Xaldin inquires, stepping out of the Corridors of Darkness.

"Just preparing to hunt down two samurai, Three." Xaloneki then tells him, she wore a mischief smile, because she knows that he can see the Roxas doodle in plain sight.

"Teeter Tot, the Superior values the keyblade wielder…So don't give Thirteen too much vexation." The air user tells her, but the smile etch on his face tells her that he's enjoying Fourteen's antics.

"Tsk, Xaldin, Four is grooming him to be the next pansy, plus, the Ouran host club intensifies his worthless factor. Marluxia can blast Vexy's baby to next week and back without igniting a bomb and the dude will still wonder what's going on."

"Another thing, as you are fully aware please enroll in more karate, kung fu, and whatever fighting classes, even join clubs if you have to, while you're there in Ouran Academy. It's because Jack had the training to go against Aku and we are not paying your tuition to flirt with boys." Xaldin reminds her.

Xaloneki sighs, knowing that she must train more, her 'Reflection' element has a limit – Like in places where there is little to no light to cause a reflection of her (She needs light for to use her element). She has been enrolling in clubs and fighting classes in Ouran Academy, even "befriending" Hunny and Mori for the lessons, just to equalize with Kisho's fighting abilities.

Both Samurai Jack and Jin Takeda had outsmarted her and barely made it alive in both instances.

The freckles face girl smiles at her guardian. "As if I'm going to allow Kisho Hitsugaya aka Samurai Jack to escape Planet Aku, Xaldin."

"Another thing, you better stand by to go to Melee Island, the Melodious Nocturne might call you."

Xaloneki rolls her eyes. "Greek guy is a dweeb, when he calls, it'll be for me to save him from being sacrifice to some volcanic god." She dislikes the fact that Demyx needed rescuing during his early days, the Toxic Geisha can recall some embarrassing moments on his behalf, to make matters worst was that he is now sent to a world with islands. "Xaldin, if he calls me that I must save him from being sacrifice to a volcanic god or goddess, I'm going to blackmail him."

"Of course, you will, Fourteen." Xaldin then smiles at her as she held his hand.

"I'm not joking; the Superior does not want to see Thirteen getting killed by your hand."

"I still say that swords rule, keyblades drool." Fourteen then makes a mischief smile.

"Be nice, Xaloneki."

"As if."

4/11

Melee Island, Carnival of the Damned,

"_No way_!" Screams Demyx, both he and Lexaeus are in Melee Island investigating the morbid amusement park. Unfortunately, a slight accident occurred, Dinghy Dog zaps Lexaeus! Transforming him into an eight year old child, the Lexy child is so scrawny, average weight, and the cutest thing ever. "Now, now, Lexy, please be good. Don't make babysitting be something that I'm gonna regret."

"Demyx, please, now I want you to go and assist Four and Eleven. I'll uncurse myself." Lexaeus tells him.

"Okay."

"I'm just fortunate it was me instead of you, otherwise my colleagues will make arrangements that you are not to go on any more missions."

"Meep."  
"Another thing, don't tell the others of what happened, Demyx."

"Okay." Demyx scribbles this note for him to remember later. He then teleports away, leaving the Silent Hero in the Carnival of the Damned.


	16. Chapter XVI, Voodoo Assistance

Chapter XVI, Voodoo Assistance

One hour later,

After lunch,

Yvette leads the two Nobodies through the swamp, since Marluxia asked her to do so and to find Voodoo and Things. There is a small dry land pathway that led to a ship. Apparently it must have been some storm for the ship got stuck in some trees.

The Voodoo lady was in the middle of hanging up some "home" décor. "Ah, hello, gentlemen." She says looking at their direction. "I sense that you are trouble and seek advice."

As they follow her into Voodoo and Things,

Vexen whines, "Eleven, I'll go first."

"Who cares, Four!"

"Don't you dare address me by a number, I'm of higher rank than you, Marluxia!" Vexen turns livid, but before he could attempt to strangle the younger Graceful Assassin in front of a child and a woman. The Mojo Lady grabs him by the arm and pulls him in, Marluxia lunge forward since he's handcuff to the founder Nobody.

"Miss. Smith, please leave. We adults will engage in a conversation." Vexen orders the pink haired girl. Yvette skips out of the entrance. A few minutes later, "You are a fraud, how can you sell these mumbo jumbo knickknacks to these delusional natives?" Marluxia signals Yvette over to find something huge enough to knock Vexen over the head with, five minutes and some rants later, Professor Yvette Smith did a huge leap and whack the Chilly Academic upside the head with the Encyclopedia Piraticania volume E.

"Thank you, Yvette."

"You're welcome, Professor Thornberry." Laughs the girl, Vexen slumps to the ground. She then leaves, knowing that Vexen will be in an incredibly murderous foul mood if he catches her within the vicinity; however she left the thick book with Marluxia.

"Okay, excused my mentor, Miss. Entropuoire of Voodoo and Things. He's just not used to the murder of scientific sense."

"No, it is forgiven, Marluxia." The Voodoo lady tells him. "For now."

The Graceful Assassin's mouth drops, how does she know his name?

"I'm ever knowing practitioner of the voodoo arts, Marluxia. Also, I sense that you and Vexen want to get out of your little handcuff predicament."

"Yes, Ma'am." Marluxia then says. "But I don't know how."

"The handcuffs are ever so much drench in all things sinister by Captain LeChuck's own evil, that they can only be removed by him...Or an equally evil companion."

Marluxia mentally curses this fact. "Isn't there any ointment or soap for my mentor and I to use on it?"

"No, this magic is more diabolical than I ever seen. To counteract it, you must find another magic that has love and can equalate or surpass its evil."

Vexen moans, Marluxia then says, "Allow me." He then uses whacks Vexen again with the Ecyclopedia Piraticania tome.

"I don't have time, Oh, Knowing One." Marluxia remembers that it was Xemnas who sent both him and Vexen to conduct Operation: The Three-Headed Monkey.

"You won't be able to find Monkey Island's most fantastic beast and its legendary secrets, Marluxia. You're more likely to obtain your freedom of the cuffs instead." The black lady smiles, the whole situation reminds Marluxia of meeting the Cheshire cat in the Wonderland world. It spoke in riddles, just like the mysterious voodoo lady. "You are a member of Organization Thirteen, Marluxia. You and your mentor are intelligent enough to break out of it, lastly, Captain LeChuck can be easily outsmarted…He often uses the same tricks, does not learn from his errors, and he's a bit naïve."


	17. Chapter XVI 12, The Fair Moon

Chapter XVI 1/2, The Fair Moon

Back at the Emo Sob Story Hotel,

Marluxia and Vexen spend most of their time attempting to remove their handcuffs, mainly it was Vexen. "Eleven."

"What?" The pink haired Nobody sneers, he's tired and wants to sleep.

"Can you wake me up when the full moon shows her fair face?"

"I thought you're a married man – No wait, a widower." He gives him puzzled looks.

"You don't know, do you?"

"Nope, except I want to sleep." Marluxia doesn't like Vexen's manical smile and the insane gleam from his partner's green eyes.

"But I want to kill the lookalike."

The Graceful Assassin plops on the bed, pulls the sheets, thus ignoring Vexen, who then laughs, "Hahahahahahahahaha!"

4/11

The next morning,

Marluxia awakens to find that Vexen asleep, "Uh, how did this guy get ergo insane in just ten years?" He only wonders, because of the old reports of the Thirteenth Order's founding did not say what Vexen did to turn mad, well, more than usual.

**Roxas (Pressing the clicker to pause the fic): Pinky should've been more careful, because whenever there's a full moon in a world where he's at. Vexen, shall we say unleashes this 'Unique' ability that even Even won't think of doing.**

**Vexen (Coming out of the Corridors of Darkness): But Thirteen, it makes me feel that I have a heart!**

**Roxas: No wounder why Axel gets concern whenever you and I go to the Ouran Academy world.**

**Vexen: That arrogant neophyte, but I must try my ability on him, no wait." (Pauses to think). "I know, I'll try on your little club friends: Kyoya Ootori and –"**

**Roxas (summons up his keyblade and attacks Vexen): **_**No**_**, not Mommy!**

**Vexen: Thirteen, cease hitting me! Somebody help!**

**Lexaeus (Coming out of the Corridors of Darkness): Vexen, you have it coming. I'm surprise that the teachers' board hired you. (Turning to the readers) Dear Readers, what Roxas was going to say was that Four's 'Unique Abilities' is triggered during a full moon…Full explanations later.**

Minutes later, at the gothically black bathroom where

"Eleven!" Wails the Chilly Academic at the Graceful Assassin, who is brushing his teeth, using his animated catcati plants to clean them. It's difficult to summon the plants to wade into the bathroom.

"Not now, I'm mmph-rushin' mah 'eeth." An irritated Marluxia glares at him.

"You did not wake me, now the full moon is gone!"

"Vexen, shesh, I don't see Saїx making a huge ruckus, lamenting that the full moon is gone and his powers are the moon!" Marluxia tells him after he gargles and spits into the sink. Vexen sits on the floor, murmuring, "Thumpthumpthumpthump! Hahahahahaha, I can see it now. Pitapatterpitapatter!"


	18. Chapter XVII, Pickpocketing 101

Chapter XVII, Pickpocketing 101

The very next day,

"Oh, yeah, especially if you pick pocketed someone…If you are lucky that is." Lauretta is giving Vexen and Marluxia a tour around Puerto Pollo, her Uncle Boris is stalking them.

"So, in order to get where you want to go you must pick up a few useful items, Miss. Dinglehop?" Marluxia then asks, this will come in handy later.

"Yes, Professor. You guys are not from around here?" The early twenties year old wrinkle her nose. She assumes that everyone in the Melee Island community knows about picking up anything that's not nailed down.

"Correction, Miss. Dinglehop." Vexen adds.

"Yeah, I have done it occasionally, Professors. Because it comes with the 'It belongs in the museum.' Career choice of mine, you just walk into a shop or home and pick up some objects behind the owner's back; as long as it is not glued to the table."

"Won't you get caught, Miss. Dinglehop?" Marluxia inquires again.

"No, Professor Pink Haired Guy." Uther Rokubi's girlfriend then tells Marluxia. "One must be extremely cunning to do so, the people don't care, or they can't miss what you just lifted out of their bags. You know Axel?"

Before Marluxia or Vexen can answer her, Professor Gondor then adds, "Don't you have some errant to run, Oh, niece of mine?" Lauretta then waves, "Bye, Hottie Vexy." At Vexen. Marluxia's profile turns a bit green, Professor Boris Gondor did likewise. They both were nauseated.

"Ahem, gentlemen, if the person's dead, you steal his belongings…Then throw a grand funeral." Boris takes over the tour; he wishes that he can expand his niece's social circle. _"Where is everyone my niece's age? She needs to get out more than reading Larry Skullery and playing video games!"_

Vexen and Marluxia heard of this from Lexaeus and Demyx's reports of Melee Island, they did not take it seriously, assuming that the Silent Hero and the Melodious Nocturne ended up at the bad side of the world and therefore are forced to steal…Until now.

Soon, after the scientists left. Marluxia then begins to pick up some items that caught his eyes. The nature trail that's hidden near the Blondebeard's chicken has some funa and thick vines growing.

The Graceful Assassin picks up the ipecac, then later takes a stroll around town to pick up various items while Vexen was rebuking him for theft, especially for "borrowing" two library books called, 'Plunder Island's legends' and 'The Big Book of Ghost Stories.' "You're more arrogant and reckless than Thirteen, Eleven! I'm not counting on you to get hang while I'm still attached to your wrist!"

A beautiful night,

The blue eyed Nobody is wondering why on earth are they in the Gondor residence, the backyard to be exact. The backyard is a botanical mishmash, this would have made Marluxia fake remorse but he's more concern with what his mission partner is intending to do next. "Vexen, you're not doing what I think you're doing?"

"Yes, Marly, we need a guide to lead us and I need a specimen to bring back to Never Was."

"Oh, I'm going to be sick."

Vexen begins to sing,"Night time sharpens…" The Organization Thirteen founder wants to take advantage of the twenty year old's crush for him.

Two minutes later,

A barrage of arrows came out of the balcony window all aimed at Vexen and Marluxia, the two Nobodies dashed out of the Gondor's property. "How appropriate you sing like an over bloated sea cow!"

4/11

"Uncle, who's that?" Lauretta innocently asks. She is busy powdering her nose, young Dinglehop is wearing a blue dress to attend the birthday party of the Plunder Island mayor's son, Drake Mallenpop.

"Just some creep, who's serenading you, my darling Niece." Boris smiles.

"Just chase him out, Dearest Uncle, because I'm in love with U-U-U, uh, Rokubi." She declares tying her necklace around her neck.

"Yes, I know you are in love with a vegetable…Or better yet, an insect whose mph is 0.3." Lauretta is always oblivious to the core reasons of why her uncle greatly dislikes young Robuki.

4/11

"_Vexen! That's got to be the most disgusting stunt that you ever did through out the entire trip_!" Marluxia moans, a couple of arrows are sticking out of their Organization Thirteen robes. To make matters worse, the arrows torn through the robes, revealing their muscles (They mentally curse Xaloneki, since she's also functions as the seamstress in their group). Marluxia thinks to himself, "_Damn it, I'm going to burk Fourteen's scrawny neck for designing my robes like this._"

Vexen interrupts Marluxia's thoughts. "I know, Eleven. But in this day and age, aristocratic girls as young as fourteen marry men about my age! I did what I have to do to gain information about these islands!" All he ever wanted was a guide to help them throughout the mission and maybe to drag her back to the World That Never Was as an experiment test subject.

"Oh, I'm sure those girls got their happily ever after."

"She should not even be courting her fellow co-worker, because of the social norms during these times. Because it is discouraged, those in the Age of Piracy find it shocking to marry those close to one's ages. Mainly because of the female mortality rates is high concerning childbirths and that the husband has to be well established."

"Right, tell that to her loving uncle, Vexen." Marluxia was wondering what kind of books, internet sites, and documentaries did the older member study for, and what world?

The next morning the two Nobodies discover that various objects are missing from their pockets, Marluxia is searching his pockets for his ipecac flower. Who in the world would sneak into their apartment and pickpocket them?


	19. Chapter Chapter XVII 12, It's Pink

Chapter XVII ½, It's Pink

Murray: Boo! Bwahahahahahahahaha!

Roxas: Credits to Princess of Rose for Beta-editing and Happy Halloween.

The Castle That Never Was,

Xaldin and Saїx found Lexaeus stepping out of the Corridors of Darkness. The wind manipulator burst out laughing at the de-aged Silent Hero, "Lexaeus, what happened to you?" "_So much for secrecy._" The Silent Hero thinks to himself.

"I encounter a being that's drenched with the power of Darkness, he has de-aged me to a ten year old."

"Problems, problems, now I know we did not have this when Guybrush met Elaine, plus, Threepwood is part of my morons list." Saїx growls.

"Definitely, Seven, but you miscaluated. Master Threepwood's adventureous endeavours puts Captain LeChu- in his place and brings peace to Melee Island." Lexaeus explains, he pulls up his black coat to cover his kid shoulders, obliviously it is too big for him now.

"Isn't LeChuck committing reverse necrophilia?" Xaldin had read the reports of the undead pirate captain.

Lexaeus's blue eyes widen in horror, "Xaldin, don't say his name aloud!"

"Tsk, I thought that Demyx was horrible." Saїx says, when the Silent Hero steps into the Corridors of Darkness.

"Oh, give him some slack, Seven. He's the only one – Besides Nine. – That knows the Melee Island world better than all of us combined, he knows that world's secrets better than we, he has a good reason to fear the undead. Lastly, Captain LeChuck's repuation was ergo bad that the locals don't take baths."

"I don't like it, Three." Saїx then says. "The fate of Melee Island and the success of any of our missions concerning it depends on a moron, who has disappeared – Was Threepwood's heart rip out by a Heartless?"

"No, Saїx, or we would've found out about it by now. Threepwood is one of those people that the Superior holds in a certain regard, though he's not up there as Sora and Riku."

Xaldin and Saїx stop their conversation short, they see their colleague dressing up in the Amanrath Society's pink samurai uniform, which belongs to Roxas. It looks like a pink dress on the small Silent Hero, since Roxas's clothes fit only Roxas.

"To quote an idiot, 'It's pink.'" The Lunar Diviner quips.

Lexaeus smiles, "Good, I'm hoping to kill some undead and walking skeletons."

"Be careful, Five. Don't ruin the uniform, I hear that Number Thirteen sometimes uses it for his hosting and he's the one that dresses three times a day." Xaldin snickers. "By the way, do you need anything?"

"Yes, just don't tell the others, except for Demyx, since he knows already about my predicament." Roxas's phone begins to ring, this is his backup one that he uses for school, he bought it for himself so he won't be using Organization Thirteen's phone for his Ouran life.

"_Hey, this is Ishiko Hirose, Roxas, don't forget we have to study for the finals. Usual meeting spot. Bye."_ The cellular phone message then says.

"I knew it, Roxas went to Port Royal while under the influence of Brain Drain pills." Saїx shakes his head sadly, he is one of the main Organization Thirteen members that thinks that Tamaki Suoh is too dumber than an microbe and doubts the Superior for enrolling the two pre-teenager Nobodies to Ouran Academy.

"I am bringing my fans and knives, gentlemen."

"But isn't LeChuck perilous, Lexy?" Xaldin asks.

"Yes, but he's up to something and I wanna find out what it is, Xaldin, Saїx."

"Just how bad is the situation, Sifu Lexaeus?" The Lunar Diviner asks.

"Okay, the whole Melee Island world is in peril of getting consumed into Darkness without our intervention, all of Governor Elaine Marley's boyfriends, significant others, and friends got a fate worse than death, and Guybrush Threepwood disappeared off of the map as well as Organization Thirteen's world radar, and in my de-aged form I cannot lift up my Axe Sword."

"Zexion was the last one to meet Guybrush on a training mission."

Lexaeus gives an exasperated expression he enters the Corridors of Darkness, the Cloaked Schemer's encounter with Threepwood was missions ago. It was also discovered that anyone entering the Carnival of the Damned is lost from view of Organization Thirteen's world camera.

AN: Amanrath Society branch in Organization XIII, which appears in many of my KH fanfics, that handles intelligence gathering (aka spying), codebreaking, counter-intelligence, and assassinating. They usually wear samurai and ninja clothes with flower, cherry blossom, and Nobody motifs.


	20. Chapter XVIII, Pillagin' and Plunderin'

Chapter XVIII, Pillagin' An' Plunderin'

Murray: Yes, credits for Princess of Rose for evil beta-editing. Bwahahahaha.

Roxas: Why must this and everything be _evil_?

Murray: Because it's part of my diabolical plan.

In the most diabolical ship that ever sail the seven seas, the Death Starfish,

"Oh, Elaine, my love, join me in this un-holy matronony." LeChuck kisses the life size cardboard cutout of the Melee Island governer. "See, I got all of this loot to buy yer love." The pirate undead captain is in his cabin, this is what he does in his spare time while sailing through out the Caribbean seas; the rest of it is to pillage and plunder all of the islands in the main Melee Tri-Island community, outside of it, and beyond it, just to pile up the loot-er, wedding day gifts in the hold.

"Captain!" Dave shouts, one of the crew skeleton members, barges into the captain's quarters.

"Wot?" Captain LeChuck exclaims angrily. _"How many times 'ust I 'ell ye, don't interrupt my daydreamin' time, unless fer emergencies_!"

"It's Organization Thirteen."

"What about 'em, Dave?"

"T-T-T-T-They sent reinforcements."

"It's unconfirmed, Captain LeChuck, Sir. It's obliviously Henry Sibberman's contemporaries." Dave, the crew member, explains.

"_Grr_." LeChuck growls, the Thirteenth Order, also known as Organization Thirteen, and Maleficient had been a nasty thorn on his side. Predominately the illustrious group of Nobodies always gets in the way of his evil plans, just like the mysterious Rusty Nailbender, he wonders why and where did this guy came from. Was he part of the Order or just working on his own? But Maleficent was bugging him to join the Hellfire Club, just to combine their forces and track down the Princesses of Heart (Though the pirate captain is wondering just how on earth did the fairy obtained both his cellular phone number and e-mail address?). It's these little nuances that bug Captain LeChuck, more so than the maggots that are burrowing into his rotting body, so what if he can hold sway over the Hammer Frames, the Air Pirates, the Rabid Dogs, and Cannon Guns? There is no way that he's going to be distracted by the Princesses of Heart quest, Elaine Marley and the Caribbean are far more important to him than whatever Maleficent is doing.

LeChuck's ring tone is heard, he answers his phone. "Hello, dearest Captain LeChuck, I, Maleficent, the Mistress of Darkness, hearby request-" The zombie pirate gives the phone to Dave. Usually, LeChuck deletes Maleficent's messages; but this time he had missed deleting this one.

"Sorry, you reach Blondebeard's Shoppe, may I take your order now?" Dave's knobby knees are knocking "Tattattattattattattatt!"

"You'll die the most ironic death, bony lackey!" Maleficient curses through the phone, ending the call.

"Aw, too bad, Dave." LeChuck gloats, grinning his rotten yellow-green teeth. "Ye were always expendable. Now leave."


	21. Chapter XIX, Oh, Boo, Hoo

Chapter XIX, Oh, Boo Hoo

Somewhere out in the Caribbean sea; Aboard the infamous, undead, and unholy ship that's aptly named the Death Starfish. Nick, the skeletal cabin boy, ventures to the captain's cabin, "The crew has been wanting ta know, Cap'n, why are we after that black robe scientist landlubber an' that pink haired Igor of his?"

"Because I need him to construct my voodoo cannonball to use fer my love, Gov. Elaine Marley, the saucy girl is cunnin' ta outsmart me. But 'unce I 'ave it, she'll have no choice but ta fwall head 'ver heels fer me."

"But didn't ye hired a batch of scientists ta help ye out earlier, Cap'n?"

"Dat I did, says ye. But they met horrible fates an' accidents buildin' an' engineerin' the Big Whoop rollercoaster in the Carnival of the Damned amusement park. Where I was forced to now use monkey labor; it is all part of my intricately sinister plan."

"And if those scientists become monkeys?"

"We can always use the extra hands to power up the Carnival of the Damned's generators."

4/11

Uther came into the Barbery Coast barber shop, he knows where he can find his follow ship mate, Edward Van Helgen. Uther Rokubi and Van Helgen shared a history of being part of the crew of the ship, Obsessivo-Compulsivo, in the failed Rattling Phlegm wreck expedition. Uther was the sixth survivor that made it back to Plunder Island, while Edward was number eighth, the rest of the 50 crew members either drown or are missing in action. "Hey, Eddie, can I ask you for love advice?"

"Sure, Little Power Monk-Uther!" Edward exclaims, he saw how messy his hair is. "You mother will make you walk the plank for sure!"

"Yeah, I know, Eddie. It's just that she giggles whenever that Dr. Malcolm guy speaks to her."

"Women have those crushes, just be thankful that her crush phases are like a shy fifteen year old girl who leaves love notes at his desk. Ladies that are her age then to do far worst, Uther, I've been there."

"But the guy gives her this creepy look that I don't like. That smile that he gives her appears like that mad scientist from that movie that likes to inject serums into virgin teenage girls."

"Uther, how bad can the guy be?"

Lauretta runs into the barber shop, kisses her boyfriend, and shows a chapter of Larry Sulkery and the Black Spot, to her boyfriend. It's a black and white illustration where the villainous, Lucifer Scurvy, the richest governor and the father of Larry's snobby racist son and rival enter the Nuts an' Bolts shop.

"Dr. Ian looks like that deliciously evil, Mr. Scurvy." She giggles, Vexen and Marluxia came inside. Dinglehop shoves the novel into Uther's chest and ran out.

"Professor Robuki, your fiancé has been telling us some interesting facts. I in turn told her about where I came from."

Edward Van Helgen's mouth drop in surprise, he almost drops his shaving knife on the floor. Marluxia rolls his eyes, he has never seen so much pirate insignias and motifs, even on the portraits that are hanging up at the walls of the barber shop. Some of them read 'Captain Charles Vain – The captain stood seven feet high in his boots. But you'd never have guessed that we dyed his roots.', 'Rachel Squall – This lady, we're certain was no debutante. She killed twenty men while she wore this bouffant.' And under a parrot's portrait reads 'In Loving Memory: Crackers (1684-1685).' "Sir, I'm beginning to think that these guys are pirates."

"Right, Thornberry."

Thanks to Vexen and young Dinglehop dragging them around Plunder Island, Marluxia discovered a lot of things, like he noticed that common sense is a bit skew here. Some of the stuff young Lauretta says and elaborates to him and Vexen are outright ludicrous…She is a walking example herself, Marluxia knows that during the Golden Age of Piracy, that women Lauretta's age should not be doing ninety-nine percent of the stuff that she gets away with. In fact that describes most of the women living, retired, or deceased members in PINS.


	22. Chapter XIX 12, The Search

Chapter XIX ½, The Search

"Is the three-headed monkey there?" Vexen moans.

"No." Marluxia sighs as they exit the barber shop.

"Did we find it yet?"

"I found it!" Uther hands them a life-size three-headed monkey stuff toy (aim for little kids and collectors). Robuki runs off laughing, the two Nobodies cannot give a good chase, but because Uther knows the alleyways and how to meander through the villas, streets, crowds, and shadowy alleyways, like a swimming sea snake.

"Where's the heck is the three-headed monkey?" Wails Vexen.

"Shesh, you've lost your mind!" Marluxia screams at Vexen. "We've been searching throughout the island for your freak of nature animal!"

"Marluxia, I've gone certifiable numerous of times when the sake of science shines and there's an opportunity for knowledge…Ask Roxas, Axel, Demyx, and the senior members of Organization Thirteen they will tell you. Even Xaloneki will tell you of what I've done for the sake of science!"

"Oh, yes, more therapy sessions for those Nobodies with Lexaeus. Right, 'Oh, Sifu Lexy, Vexen experimented on me and now I'm scarred for life.'"

"Actually, I taught them –" Vexen then smiles, he would have said "_Internal water manipulation_." But that quickly changed it to "I taught them science and specimen gathering."

4/11

"_Help_!" Screams Vexen and Marluxia, how they got stuck on a cliff face and are hanging by their handcuffs is anyone's guess? Down below is the Atlantic Sea where are sharks swimming below.

NoteTrap hovers over them. "Hi, I'll get help!"

"Hurry, I've got too much ground to cover." Vexen screams cowardly, the Graceful Assassin rolls his eyes, apparently the Chilly Academic is afraid of death or fading.

Marluxia scoffs, "Hmph, you big baby! In the world whence I came from, boys are taught to face death with honor and to not be afraid of it!"

"Stupid samurai, shut up!" Screams Vexen.

Thirty minutes later,

"Of all people in this island, in all of the worlds, dimensions, and parallel universes, we must get rescued by _them!"_ Wails Four, he places back his black glove with a slight difficulty, he has spent a full thirty minutes attempting to undo the screw on the handcuffs.

PINS used a crane to fish out the two Nobodies, this crane is only use for special occasions.

"We won't ask just how you both ended up down there." Mrs. Brinestoop sighs, her pupil Anwell Maverick, and the other PINS members just made similar remarks.

"My wedding ring!" Vexen then screams in angst, he shows Marluxia his bare hand, the Graceful Assassin's eyes widen, his thoughts are more of _"What kind of moron marries this guy?"_

He can see where the wedding band used to be on Vexen's ring finger. "It's the only object that I had left of my sweet Undwari."

This made PINS silent, they did not take the ring, only Lauretta gives a compassionate and sympathetic stare.

Boris remits him a shiny object, it was the missing ring. "You're fortunate that I purloin it, my gut instinct told me that you are going to loose it one way or the other."

The Chilly Academic took some time to inspect his wedding ring, "How do I know that it's not cursed with everlasting stupidity or anything that makes you in Hollow Bastion and Port Royale's most wanted list?"

"I'm Boris Gondor of the proud PINS, impossible stealing is second nature to us benevolent pirates. I know honor and glory and how valuable a wedding ring is, Ian, those are one of the world's most treasured treasures that I won't steal."

Vexen is livid at the pirates' audacity, he whips out Freeze Pride, when Mercelina Brinestoop shouts, "Look there are two three-headed monkeys behind ye!" The green eyed Nobody looks behind him, the Graceful Assassin can see that PINS took off running, and some like Delvin Droll summons up a Corridor of Darkness and steps in. When Vexen finds out that the scientists evacuated, leaving him and Marluxia alone.

"Ian, are you going to thank our rescuers?" Marluxia then asks, but Vexen just drags him away.

"This is not a group of naturalists, but a guild of thieves, Nigel."


	23. Chapter XX, Anwell the Intern

Chapter XX, Anwell, the Intern

"Prof. Brinestoop!" Vexen wails, he is enraged. "Maverick stolen the contents of my wallet!" The Chilly Academic steps out of the Corridors of Darkness with Marluxia in tow.

"Anwell?" The cheery lady in her forties then question, the greasy black haired Delvin Droll nods in agreement. "Oh, no, Professor Maverick is the intern-apprentice. There's no way he is that good a thief."

Maverick, who was reading his tome at the corner, closes it in shock. "Wot?" He exclaims.

Vexen marches towards, "You kleptomanic, _I know that you stolen my wallet_!"

"This is not the kleptomanic you're looking for."

"You're not the kleptomanic I'm looking for." Vexen then says. Marluxia and the other PINS can see that the Chilly Academic is in some sort of spell from Anwell.

"You must go search for the three-headed monkey."

"I must go search for the three-headed monkey."

"Carry on, Anwell, for science's sake."

"Carry on, Anwell, for science's sake." Vexen then leaves the Ansem the Wise lookalike alone. The Graceful Assassin's mouth drops in surprise, how was Xigbar able to teach this guy anything? If the naturalist has this power, then how powerful is he?

"Come along, Eleven." Vexen tells him.

"But, Vexen!" Marluxia protests as they were walking out the PINS museum.

"We have to go if we are going to catch our quarry."

When Marluxia and Vexen left,

Yvette smiles, "Wow, Anwell, you're getting really good at doing the Mind Trick spell."

"I know, it only works with weak minded inviduals. Though I suspect that Pinky-locks suspect a thing. Unfortunately, I can't Mind Trick more than one."

Delvin then asks a question, "Ergo, what did you steal from him?"

Anwell gives a cheshire cat grin, "I got a ton of munny…And a picture of this lady. I must've grabbed it by accident when I purloined the dough." The lady in the picture is Undwari.

"Here, find a way to return this to Vexen, Yvette."

"Yippie." The pink haired girl jumps up and down in glee. "Oh, she's pretty, like a princess."

"Ladies and gentlemen, I'm going to the jungle to put up these signs." Prof. Brinestoop, she has her explorer tools, a hammer, and a box of nails ready. She tosses the keys to Anwell. "You're in charge of everything, especially the museum keys, Maverick."

During mid-air, Anwell uses the Force to catch the keys.

"Don't worry, Professor. You can count on me."

**Roxas: So, I'm wondering if Maverick is Force sensitive. Why didn't he do crazy stuff on Xiggy?**

**Xigbar: Dude, I threaten to tattle on him to Lexy, his boss-lady, and no expeditions.**

**Roxas: Why does a being like Anwell exist? I thought they all lived in the Galaxy Far, Far Away world.**

**Xigbar: Little Dude, Melee Island and the Galaxy Far, Far Away are cousins.**

**Vexen: How could you do this to me, Xigbar? If Anwell was a Nobody, he'll be picking my pockets twenty-four/ seven!**


	24. Chapter XXI, Mad Scarf

Chapter XXI, Mad Scarf

While both Vexen and Marluxia are eating their lunch in Blondebeard's chicken shop, thanks to a membership card that they got from Uther Robuki for making his girlfriend happy.

"Vexen, how old does a woman have to be to court a man in the Golden Age of Piracy?" The Graceful Assassin then asks, he did not pay attention to the Port Royale guide of courtship at the Castle That Never Was library.

Vexen was cutting up his drumsticks and chicken breasts with his knife. "Marluxia, I thought you were taught history. Okay, during the 17th and early 18th century, it's when they turn fourteen years old. Miss. Dinglehop should be almost an old maid and –" The Chilly Academic pauses, then says. "I never really thought of these things when I step here, I am more focus in completing my missions. Come to think of it, she and what I heard of the women here is predominately weird, there are no women leading scientists at this time."

"Precisely, then I see stuff that were not invented at this time."

"Those are called anachronisms, indeed, Eleven." Vexen corrects the Graceful Assassin while he picks up a drumstick with his free hand and begins to eat.

Marluxia is still thinking about the curious women of the Plunder Island Naturalist Society, they and various objects, especially in the horrible "Speare!" Play showed objects, events, and idea concepts that were not found during this time.

Anwell Maverick burst through the gate, "Blondebeard!" The chef came out of the kitchen, "Mad Scarf, what happen?"

"She was eaten by the Massive, Man-Eating snake!" Anwell screams in hysterics. "Delvin barely made it alive!"

"Who?"

Vexen tells Marluxia in a low voice, "That's how Ansem the Wise acted like when he found out about our experiments." Though personally he wishes that it was Professor Maverick, King Mickey, and the real Ansem the Wise that could've gotten consume by the huge green snake of the deep jungle.

"Mrs. Brinestoop!"


	25. Chapter XXII, The Funeral

Chapter XXII, The Funeral

The sky turned gloomy, grey, and absolutely depressing at the Plunder Island grave site where they erected a memorial epitaph in honor of Mrs. Marcelina Brinestoop. All of the members of the Plunder Island Naturalist Society, Vexen, Marluxia, and the naturalists' friends, family members, and some of the locals all attended the funeral of Plunder Island Naturalist Society leader.

Professor Brinestoop's widower husband and her children are there, but some of the kids are very apathic. Anwell Maverick is seen trying his hardest not to cry and be a man.

Lauretta was just solemn, there is no emotion in her face and not even tears are flowing down. Marluxia and Vexen just wore an emotionless expression; the older Nobody just wants to get back with the mission and assuming that he has no time for these 'petty' displays of remorse.

Uther clasp his hand into hers, but the rest of them are crying, dabbing their hankerchiefs, and sobbing.

"Now time to say a tribute for the late Dr. Brinestoop, participants step up."

Mr. Brinestoop just sighs, "I'll love you, my Sea Cucumber." He lays the cutlass, Pure Vortex Dancer, in front of the memorial. It was laid in a respectful way with the hilt almost touching the tombstone. Some of the Brinestoop kids said a "We'll miss ya, Mom." But actually it sounds more like "Good riddance." Apparently, the mother did not spend time with the children.

"My dearly beloved friend." It was Anwell Maverick's turn to speak. "I'll forever be grateful for you saving me from more ways than I can count, especially our time in the good ship, Gallbladder, where we first met in the quest for Big Whoop. Bid a 'Hello' to Professor Another in the big cloud lab of scientific scalleywags,…Bye."

Marluxia turn then came up, "Uh, Doctor, we hardly knew you. Bye."

During the funeral dinner, Marluxia seeks out Boris Gondor. "Boris, can I spare a few minutes with you?" The dinner complies of food that is mostly of tofu in the shape of meats that is usually in a lavish dinner.

"Sure, Dr. Thornberry." Boris says. "Shoot."

"Why is there an abundant of pirate paraphilia and décor, Dr. Gondor?"

"Oh, that's usually normal, Professor. What islands do you hail from? Everyone in Melee Tri-Island Community are pirates, except for a few merchants. I always believed that the man or woman I'm talking to are pirates, even the kids, their parents, and their parents' parents are salty scalleywags." Lauretta joins at her uncle at the table, she wore a black dress with sequences and the only thing that does not go well with the dress is her boots.

"Hi, Uncle Boris."

Vexen smirks at the scene. He is wondering how to get a heart sample from her.

Marluxia then asks, "Then why is Professor Maverick called 'Mad Scarf'?"

"Because he wears his lucky scarf most of the time, it is hard to imagine him without the scarlet scarf." The Plunder Islander explains.

That night when the two Nobodies return to their apartment, Marluxia then asks, "Vexen, I did not feel any remorse when I was there at the memorial service. Sorry if it, my little vocal tribute, was not par."

"No, Eleven, it is as expected. You do not have any remorse because you do not have any emotions; they got rob by the heartlesses."

"But Vexen, I can still feel my heart beating."

"I am talking about a metaphysical sense, Eleven. The heartlesses are supernatural beings like a ghost, when one transforms into a Nobody they become a being that has no traces of feelings yet with supernatural elemental powers. More will be explained in the reports and archives, especially in the libraries of the World That Never Was and Castle Oblivion."

Vexen awakens to hear Marluxia hugging his pillow chuckling in his sleep. "HHhmmmppphhfff, oh, Larxene, I'll be your pin cushion….I'm a masochist, stab me…You can do whatever…I'm here." The Chilly Academic rolls his eyes, he never had to be in pain when he was dating his wife a long time ago in Hollow Bastion.


	26. Chapter XXII 05, The Slumber Party

Chapter XXII ½, The Slumber Party

Meanwhile back in the Castle That Never Was,

At the Where Nothing Gathers,

Xaloneki smiles, "See, everyone, I got permission from Xemnas, Ruler of the World That Never Was, to hold a slumber party for my friends from Ouran Academy." She even waves the permission slip that has Xemnas's signature.

"Oh, of course." Xemnas sighs, wondering how did he got that idea to give her permission in the first place.

Saix growls a feral growl, Number Fourteen's friends squeal in delight, "Squee, a puppy!"

When Xaloneki was showing her friends, Arunima, Carlee, and Dai, around she lead them to her washing/ sewing room, "This, ladies, was the place where I make every uniform that you see." Her friends are dressed in black coats.

She led them to two vats located at the corner, "Vat #1, Protects the wearer from the corroding power of Darkness. Vat #2, are specially designed microscophic bacteria that rips the coat apart in battle. The bacteria are very intelligent (and are made by yours truly), they can tell the difference between male and female."

"You mean we'll see shirtless guys, Xaloneki?"

"Yes, as long as Saїx doesn't catch us, he talks about getting permission to nuke the Ouran Academy world."

"Aw, Puppy is so cute when he makes death threats." Dai then says.

"You really think so? He even says that if he had his way, he would."

Her classmates nod.

"Oh, so cool, but now these coats are made in a large factory nearby. Just wait till I show you the samurai garb of the Amarath Society and the Akatsuki, made by the same brilliant mind (Though with the Akatsuki robes, I had to update them to Darkness repelling standards) which are in my office in said factory."

After the factory tour, the girls all waited at the entrance way to the Castle That Never Was, when Roxas steps out of the Corridors of Darkness, the top half of his black coat was torn in half. He collaspses on the floor moaning, the Key of Destiny was exhausted, because he was experimenting in the lab.

"_So hot_!" Squeals the three girls.

Roxas swears, of all the sounds he has to hear its Xaloneki and fellow Ouran girl friends. "Fourteen!"

"Thirteen, I am conducting a slumber party and I want you to be a host, please."

The Key of Destiny scowls, it reminds the Toxic Geisha of Vexen…A very irriated Vexen.

"I _refuse_, I don't do that on a whim and for free, Fourteen!"

Arunima, Carlee, and Dai began to see hearts, a very mad shirtless Roxas is so romantic in their eyes.

"I'll pay you, Roxas!" Xaloneki pleads. "And you must lessen hanging out with IV, his cranky personality is rubbing off of you."

"I'll pay too!" Dai, Carlee, and Arunima chorus behind her, this lessen Roxas's irriatibility.

"If only you'd expressed some scientific enthuasism then I won't be so stuffy, XIV-"

The freckle face Nobody pouts and gives Roxas the puppy eyes. This made him smile. "Now, XIV, I'm a bit busy as to speak –" He was interrupted by Xigbar. The Freeshooter is hanging upside down from space, this made XIV's friends "Oohhh." and "AAhhh."

"Dude, no, you're spoiling the fun."

"Number II, I am under substantial amount of pressure – Axel and Luxord need rescueing (I barely made it back alive) and –"

Xigbar puts his arm around Roxas, "XIII, you need to relax."

"But-but-"

"Now go ask Xaldin for help- I won't take it kindly that you disappoint my widdle baby princess."


	27. Chapter 23, Search for 3headed monkey

Chapter XXIII, The Search For the Three Headed Monkey

Killing two birds with one stone, hmm, a simple little phrase pertaining to multi-tasking to get this one goal. It is easy with anyone, but as Marluxia, the Graceful Assassin, figured out the phrase works with anyone…Except for him. "Eleven, this will kill two birds with one stone." Vexen argues back, unfortunately, the Chilly Academic can and will get what he wants because of the "I'm Number Four, you are Number Eleven, I'm a higher number than you and far superior to you." Schitck.

The two Nobodies went off to search of any information regarding the object of their quest.

"Hi, Sir, do you –" Vexen was about to ask, the pirate bum points at Marluxia. "Arruggghh, that man's hair is pink! ! You're killing me!" In fact the next men, women, and children that they inquire, either laugh at Marluxia's hair color or asks if they are demented. "The three-headed monkey is just a myth."

"Vexen, lets just find a way to unhandcuff ourselves." Moans Marluxia, after the umpteenth person informed them that the creature was just a story; actually the two headed monkey only stares upword at the two Nobodies. "Oook?"

Marluxia then asks, "Hey, little guy, can you show us the three headed monkey, okay?"

"_AAhhhhhhhh_!" Screams the two headed monkey, runing away.

"Vexen!" Marluxia rebukes him. The Chilly Academic cautiously puts away his syringe into his pockets.

"Can't we just abduct the two headed monkey for experimentation while we are at it, Eleven? I need something to open up for scientific purposes."

"Won't it escape while we are searching for the three-headed monkey?"

"Right, I don't want to be late in bringing in specimens. The Superior can get impatient."

4/11

"AHHhh." Edward Van Helgen says, though he can carry a note, singing was not what he had in mind when Vexen walks into the Barbery Coast barber shop dragging Marluxia, since they are both handcuff to each other. The Barbery Coast is a barber shop own by three pirate barbers, who are in friendly terms with the adventure seeking Plunder Island Naturalist Society; especially since Edward knew Uther Robuki. Edward Van Helgen considers himself as a gentleman, despite the fact that he is a pirate, he wears the attire associated as such and is a bit well groom and flamboyant compare to his fellow barbers. His clothes are clean and there is not a tear in his breeches and cravat; this does not hide the fact that he has an eye patch, has a goatee, mustache, and a perchance for treasure.

"Oh, my Mother's favorite nickers!" Haggis McMutton's jaw drops at the sight of Marluxia placing his hood back and the floating cherry blossoms, revealing the color of his bushy, messy locks. McMutton is the big muscle guy of the group and in all his Scottish years he never seen anyone like Marluxia.

Cutthroat Bill became speechless at the sight of the Graceful Assassin, the porty yet burly pirate is the shortest of the three pirate barbers and is soft spoken out of the lot. Vexen begins his inquires. "Hello, my good man, do you have any clues of the whereabouts of the elusive three-headed monkey?"

"!" The three barbers all fall on the floor laughing, Vexen then asks, "Is something in my hair?"

"No, laddie." The burly Scottishman then says, he points at Marluxia's hair. "Yer friend there, his locks are as pink as a baby maid's dress. Ma-hahahahahahahahaha!"

"What happen to you, Doctor Thornberry?" Edward Van Helgan then asks.

"Maybe yer baby sister decided that ye need a hair makeover." Cutthroat Bill then adds. Marluxia pulls his black hood over his head, hiding his hair from view. The laughing slowly ceases, until Van Helgen was able to talk. "Okay, have you talked with Professors Dinglehop and Robuki? They are the only weird animal scientists in all of Plunder Island Naturalist Society, they specializes in the department of animals that many knows that does not exists."

"No wonder why Master Lexaeus recruited them to catalogue different types of heartlesses and lesser Nobodies." Marluxia sighs, he was just relieved to be out of the Barbery Coast, any longer could result in him having his hair cut and being advised to wear an itchy wig.

"Eleven, I disagree and disapprove of Lexaeus getting them to assist us in these important ventures of the Thirteenth Order. I don't want to think of what they would do if they have the positions of power equal to that of the Thirteenth Order founders."

"Why?"

"It's just like giving Hollow Bastion Department of Administrative Research powers and they aren't worthy nor do they comprehend anything scientific (Except for Xaldin and Lexaeus)."


	28. Chapter XXIII, Largo and Murray

Chapter XXIII ½, Largo and Murray

In the Death Starfish,

LeChuck gathers his undead skeleton crew for a meeting. "Gentlemen, I gather you all here for this meeting. You will all go as I have instructed you, however do not interfere with my previous first mate, Largo, and the new guy, Murray, for I have assigned them on a mission of vast importance."

4/11

Largo and Murray are sailing off, suppose to be, their ship is in the middle of the ocean. "You insolent fool, slave of fashion!" Largo spats at Murray, the two are fighting (again). "We are not going to the Dandy's clothing stores to get ye a hat, cape, and gloves!"

"But I must look a bit good looking for my intricate plot to spread _evil_ throughout the Caribbean, Largo!" Murray tells him.

"I wanna find the Dumb Blonde Nobody and the Pinkie, not go clothing shopping, you pathetic Dandy!" Largo points his cutlass at Murray, but the skeleton only stood firm.

"I'm Murray, the Devil's Advocate. So, I'm not afraid of an ex-First Mate that can't do My Liege's bidding!"

"You Girlfriend Ditcher!" Largo bellows, Murray brandishes his cutlass.

"That's low, you Pig!" Murray says enraged. Largo had touch something sensitive about the new LeChuckism crew member's past and Murray does not want it to be mention. "I only ditch her to show the world that I'm pure _evil_!"

4/11

"So, Murray and Largo should be on their way to find Vexen and his pink haired lab assistant. Vexen's vital to my plan." LeChuck rubs his hands sinisterly. His cellular phone rang, "If it's Maleficent or her's associates, don't answer, my love life is too important to be Princess searching."

When Paul, the skeleton secretary (he replaced Dave, who was cursed by Maleficent's message), answers it, Warf Rat is panicking at the other line.

"_Wot_?" An enraged LeChuck screams, he walks over and grabs the cellular phone. "Warf Rat!"

Meanwhile, at the Carnival of the Damned,

A skeleton finds and brings a kiddie Lexaeus to Warf Rat, "Warf Rat, we found him."

The guy in a rat costume then asks, "You runt, aren't you a little young to be plotting and orchestrating a jailbreaking from your play pen?"

"Why, yes. Yes, I am." Lexaeus gives a smile of mischief, crosses his hands over his chest.

"Why is this kid dressed in pink?" The skeleton sighs. "Also, where are his shoes?"

"Place the brat into the time out cell and put the Voodoo Anklet of Extreme Discomfort on him." Warf Rat bellows, Lexaeus made the ground under Warf Rat's feet quick, soon he sunk waist length. "Hurray, please."

The skeleton drops Lexaeus, who quickly uses his elemental powers and burrows into the earth.

"_Fred_!"

Dingy Dog is sweating beads of sweat, he thinks "_Hyuk, no they're not. They're all rivals of Captain LeChu- for Governor Marley's hand, they've all been de-aged into kids_." He digs out of the ground and gets to his feet, "I'll go over an' assist Warf Rat, my good captain, hyuk, hyuk." The last thing that Dingy Dog wants is LeChuck finding out that he can't keep a bunch of de-aged men under control.

4/11

Back in Plunder Island,

Both Nobodies are on their way to the Plunder Island library, when Vexen's phone rangs, "Oh, it's Nine."

"That's odd, we are expecting a phone call from Lexaeus."

"_Demyx,_ where is Lexaeus?"

"_He's entirely busy with his field work and can't talk, Vexy_."

Marluxia gives a worry glare. "Something's happen to him…Demyx!"

"Demyx, even if Lexaeus is in a beach barbuque watching a hula dance with a girlfriend, he can and will talk to us!"

"_Oh, look behind you, a three-headed monkey playing a xalophone and riding a unicycle_!" Demyx shouts gleefully.

Marluxia and Vexen looks behind their shoulders, this gave the Melodious Nocturne enough time to hang up. "Bye." He yelps.

"_I'm going to drain the Silent Hero's bodily fuilds when I get my hands on him_!"

"How dare you!" Marluxia, with his free hand, punches Vexen squarely in the face.

"_Respect your elders_!" Wails the Chilly Academic.


	29. Chapter XXIV, The Ego

Chapter XXIV, The Ego

**Murray: The EVIL beta-reading credits goes to Princess of Rose.**

Lauretta Dinglehop quickly climbs up the ladder in search of the book in the bookshelf of the Plunder Island library, her climbing is similar to a squirrel darting up on the tree as though it were flying instead. She pulls a huge phone book thick volume, it is leather bound, olive green, and has the golden title called, "Legendaria." Written by Doctor Esther , P.M.D. And Professor Arthur U. Denison P.M.A.

"Ian, here it is." Lauretta Dinglehop then says. "By the way, you want me to open up the Crypto-ZooDex."

"No, thank you, by the way Dinglehop what are your opinions on the elusive three-headed monkey?" Vexen asks.

The young woman spaces out, she then shouts down to them, "I think it is just a taxidermist and a desperate explorer teaming up for munny, the explorer would not returned home for fear of ridicule so the fur guy made a toy for him. Although like big foot, there is conclusive evidence of the three headed monkey's existence. I just don't know basically, just sightings, damage crops gnaw off weirdly, and photos. No hardcore evidence of a specimen is bought."

"Just show us the sightings, please!" Marluxia implores as the young woman slides down the ladder.

"Sure, Thornberry and Ian." Lauretta then heads towards the computer room. Marluxia sighs, "Oy, we got your tome, Vexen. Let's go and find the stupid monkey. So we can be done with this mission."

"I believe that our young nimrod of a friend wrote this book." Vexen then tells Marluxia, once she is out of earshot.

"What makes you say that, Vexen?"

Vexen opens up the Legendaria book and turns to the section of the three-headed monkey. There amongst the pages there is the article, some of the sentances are word for word, yet it is more indept and even shows the information of the sightings that are known throughout the islands.

"Come, Eleven, lets start by going to Scabb, then Booty, or the nearest islands."

"But Vexen, we will be here forever."

"That's the disadvantage that we have to take, but it is for scientific purporses, Marluxia. That is after when we bring down these fools." Vexen groans, the thought of going through this mission handcuff to a disagreeable arrogant student for months is very uneasy to the founding Nobody.

**Lexaeus: You know what, that's Vexen's flaw. It's not bonding with his mission partner. He only associates with those that he deems highly as his equal.**

**Roxas: That explains why everyone in Organization XIII and the Amanrath Society gives huge praises to you.**

**Lexaeus: Yes, like Sora, I value friendships. I'm a people Nobody, Roxas.**


	30. Chapter XXIV05, Lesser Nobodies

Chapter XXIV ½, Lesser Nobodies

**Murray: Bwahahahahahhaha!**

**Roxas: Let me guess, credits to Al for the very EVIL beta-reading.**

**Murray: You're not taking me seriously, are you, Roxas?**

"Vexen, we got your tome. But I'm wondering, why did you treat Ms. Dinglehop as though she lost her mind?" Marluxia asks.

"I have no reason to give her due respect." Vexen brashly tells the Graceful Assassin.

"Why? I've heard so much about PINS from Sifu Lexaeus and she hasn't done much to injure you or anything."

Vexen raises his eyebrows giving him a 'What are you talking about?' expression. "Oh, that, I treat almost everyone that way, Eleven, except for Xemnas. Whether they are in Organization Thirteen or not." But in the ice wielder's mind, _"What was Zexion thinking when he picked her as his Nobody successor, she's like Naruto, an autistic idiot with too much power!"_

"Oh, Marluxia." Vexen then addresses his colleague. He summons up one of his Lesser Nobody Yuki-onnas. "This is Hanae, my niece, respect her, commit it to memory? I trust her more than Lucretica."

"Oh." Marluxia's expression is of disinterest. "Yep, and here's my best man, Kumakichi Ishibashi." He then calls forth one of this Geisha Angel Lesser Nobodies. "He is born and raise with Bushido and Arik's gentlemanly court conduct."

"Really, lady and gentlemen, we are going to find and capture the three-headed monkey for Organization XIII. Understood?"

The Yuki-onna and Geisha Angel only look at Vexen and Marluxia, shrug their shoulders, and stare at each other.

"We would need supplies for to build a trap, are you both prepared?" Vexen then addresses the two Lessers. The latter nods in agreement, lastly, the Chilly Academic hands them a list of items. When the two Lesser Nobodies step into the Corridors of Darkness to go steal some of the items. "I hope that brute doesn't harass my niece."

"Kumakichi is a man of honor, Vexen. I'm more concerned about her seducing him."

"Hanae won't do such a thing, she's like a Princess of Heart (sorta) and not quite."

Meanwhile, in Shipwreck Cove…

Usually Lesser Nobodies listen and take the sides of the humanoid Nobodies that are master over them. Except these two,

"Come back you thieves!" Screams Mad Marty, he and Porom, are running after the two Lesser Nobodies; Porom takes out her pistol and fires at them.

The Yuki-Onna and Geisha Angel had stolen ropes, some of the lunadry from Mad Marty's, and Pegbiter's pet couch basket.

"Mad Marty, I didn't know that Heartlesses were so quiet and sneaky."

"Er, speak louder Patty, I can't hear you."

Porom writes something on a piece of paper, she made sure that it's large enough for Marty to read. "I know, Old Tom Bannerson ain't gonna like this."

**Roxas: And neither will I, those two Lesser Nobodies have been getting too chummy together.**


	31. Chapter XXV, Eatting at Blondebeard's

Chapter XXV, Eating at Blondebeard's

The next day, Vexen is in high spirits mainly because they both have membership cards to Captain Blondebeard's Chicken Shoppe. "No, Eleven, I'm a higher ranking number than you. So I go first." Vexen enters the take out restaurant, followed by Marluxia.

"As if the numerical number is that important." But before he and Vexen can get into an argument of number ranks, Vexen jumps into his arms, "_AAaiiiiiieeeee_!" He points to the nearby table where a skeletal well dress customer was stabbed at the back by a knife. The chef lets out a crackle from the kitchen, "He was complaining 'bout de way I cook me chicken, gentlemen. Don't mind 'im."

"The guy is wearing a button that reads, 'Ask me about Grim Fandango'." Marluxia says as he straightens the late patron. "Why do I have a feeling everyone's a pirate here?"

"Dr. Thornberry, we're just going to sit at the next table and order our lunch, pretend that he's not there." Vexen advices (The skeleton plops head first onto the table).

Near the window was a barrel that contains strong smelling already homemade biscuits, Marluxia cannot help but inch his way towards the barrel. The hand held bread with his flaky texture and buttery aroma reminds him of his home where the palace servants cooked them.

He snags a few biscuits in his pocket, the seventh and last one he took a bite. "_MMppphhhh_!" Marluxia then realizes that the biscuit that he bit into contains maggots! He quickly hands the biscuit with his bite to Vexen, upon inspection. "You did not tell me that these biscuits contained live still wriggling maggots!"

Captain Blondebeard hops out of the kitchen and brags, "Aye, it's the Blondebeard special ingredient an' meself cannot quit puttin' 'em into the batter." Marluxia spent getting the wormy creatures out of his mouth, but after listening to Yvette and Lauretta rambling he will not discard the biscuits that are already in his pockets.

When Vexen and Marluxia sat together in the same table, Blondebeard hops out, he has a pencil and note pad in hand. "What may ye orders be, ye landlubbers?"

Vexen already orders for the both of them."The Ipecac Slaw, the Admiral's Bucket, the Bucket-O-Booty, and the Goden Bounty Gravy as well."

"Anything to drink, gentlemen?"

"I'll have the Old Grand Pappy grog." Vexen says, remitting the menu.

"Caribbean Kiwi Grog." Marluxia adds, when the peg leg chef left, the Graceful Assassin asks Vexen in a low voice. "What's grog?"

"It's actually rum mixed with water, Marluxia. Now a long time ago in Radiant Garden, there is a kiddie restaurant in down town that has a very pirate theme. Young and old always come back for more."

When the meals arrived, Vexen and Marluxia almost lost their appetite. The Admiral's Bucket is actually the chicken's organs fried golden brown, the Bucket-O-Booty only consists eyes, beaks, and talons. Vexen was about to use his fork and jab at the seemingly innocent coslaw…But Marluxia cries out, "IPECAC! That's a purgative!"

Vexen's green eyes widen with shock as he stared at Captain Blondebeard, who is laughing at them. "I know, it'll make ye hungry fer more." A few minutes later, their grog arrives.

Vexen and Marluxia were about to drink when the mug of Vexen's Old Grandpappy dissolve the mug into a metal soup. "Marluxia, I found our way out. We must pour our grog onto the handcuff chain, because the grog of this world is highly acidic." Using his free hand, Vexen uses Marluxia's Caribbean Kiwi and meticulously pours it at the handcuff chain. He manages to cause a hole on the table itself, the red and white checkered table cloth, and even burning up their hands. "Blast, I don't believe this!" Vexen swears; it turns out that the handcuffs are undamaged.

"We need those doggy containers, Captain." Marluxia lies. "We are so hungry that we are ordering take outs."

"The Skinless Chicken Bucket." Vexen calls out, that is the only menu item that he remembers.

"Do ye want eyes instead of potatoes or heapin' globs of lard?"

After Marluxia is done securing the Ipecac Slaw in a container, both he and Vexen managed to eat a few drum sticks and chicken breasts of this next bucket. However they are successful in throwing away the rest of their meal without Captain Blondebeard's knowledge, tossing it into the Corridor of Darkness. They do not want to figure out what the lard is and how old it is, especially unbeknownst, Blondebeard keeps the lard at the back of the restaurant for – According to him. - Special occasions.

The Graceful Assassin walks out happily regardless of his hand burning like hell and smelling like a mixture of kiwi, tropical fruits, and kerosene, because he has a wonderful delicious daydream._ He is force feeding Xemnas the contents of the Admiral's Bucket. "Don't worry, Superior. I hear this is popular with the locals."_

"_Eleven, how dare you I refuse to eat such a loathsome and disgusting meal!" Xemnas lividly shouts at him. The leader of the Nobodies is tied up on a chair with special ropes._

"_This is retaliation for sending me out here so ill prepared, Superior."_

Later they met Lauretta at the entrance of the post office; she is getting a can of grog from a vending machine, which is much similar to a soda machine, except it contains the alcoholic beverage. "Miss. Dinglehop, aren't you a bit young?"

"Yeah, but this is a useful item for non-drinking purposes, Professors." She blushes at the sight of Vexen. It is crazy, Vexen and Marluxia's mugs all dissolved into metal and clay puddles but the soda can is not melting? The young naturalist went off, in cue, Professor Droll came in and inserted his Pieces of Eight into the coin slot. "Is she a bit under age for drinking?" Vexen asks.

"No, she and her sluggard of a boyfriend of hers always make sure that they have a can in their person." Professor Droll answers his question.

"Why?"

"I don't know exactly, gentlemen." Droll stuffs the can into his pockets; Vexen smiles mischievously and mouths to Marluxia "Binge drinking." It took Marluxia a few grey cells to figure it out, the way Vexen made his creepy smile spells that Radiant Garden's young adults are infamous for binge drinking.

AN: For those that don't know, in the Monkey Island games, the grog is different than real life.


	32. 25 & half, Think of the PINS Kids

Chapter XXV and 1/2, Think of the PINS Children

"Oh, thank you, Professors Malcolm and Thornberry." Anwell Maverick gives them hugs. "If I ever get married, I'm naming my sons after you two."

Marluxia quips, "I got a very bad feeling about this, Vexen."

"I'll prove to you that El Pollo Diablo doesn't exist, Maverick." Vexen wails.

"Prove it, Ian!" Maverick gives a daring smirk.

"Oh, I would!"

"Apparently, the list of causalities won't disway them." Delvin Droll then says, the minute when Vexen and Marluxia left for the Emo Sob Story Hotel, he finally says. "I find it a bit ironic that Ian and Nigel are here searching for the mythical three-headed monkey. I wonder why Lexaeus keeps his friendship with them?"

"It's a good thing that they came along, Anwell."

"I know. I have to think of the PINS children, at least the young ones don't have to write their wills. I hate to go over their wills for grammar."

"_Squee!_" A high pitch squee was heard throughout Plunder Island. Anwell and Delvin recognizes it as Luaretta, Uther, and Yvette.

In the Emo Sob Story Hotel,

"Vexen, did you hear that?" Marluxia gasps.

"Yes, Marluxia, it sounds like Roxas's brain dead female clients from Ouran Academy entering into the Third Music room being wowed by the host club (Please, don't ask why Roxas is in one, I don't wanna think about it myself)."

"No, I mean that something bad is going to happen to us! Concerning El Pollo Diabol!"

"Oh, I thought that you were gonna say Midi-chlorians, Eleven."

"What?"

"You could find a report penned by Lexaeus and Demyx, it contains most of the locals here in Melee Island. However Five did his fair share of researching Force sensitives when we interviewed Master Barrek of the Galaxy Far, Far Away." Vexen then gives an exasperated sigh, he then mutters something inaudible about wielding the water inside of Lexaeus; then says aloud. "I hate Five's pirate friends!"


	33. Chapter XXVI, Evolutionary Diet

Chapter XXVI, Evolutionary Diet

Lexeaus Reports

While Demyx and I are in the Melee Island world, I discovered the most astonishing thing. This world's inhabitants developed a high and extrodinaire body tolerance and immunity to poisonous substances or food that's prepared in the most grosteously ways. – The prime example is one of the popular drinks that is served is grog, now the grog is prepared and brewed differently than the water, lime, and rum version of the Port Royal world. It can be made out of these perilous ingredients of the following: kerosene, rum, acetone, red dye no. 2, scumm, battery acid, pepperoni, sulfuric acid, propylene glycol, artificial sweeteners, and axle grease. In addition, the entire recipe for this version of grog is a heavily guarded secret.

With this example alone above, clearly most of what is considered as food in this world is highly perilous for our consumption and drinking. At times the food is prepared oddly, in the Scumm Bar, the humble cook makes his dishes in a disgusting manner that it takes all of one's energy to eat it (Hopefully there are no entrails, fish heads, or unpleasant food in the meal) and he does not like complaints or people entering his kitchen. Although, the natives here are an evolutionary enigma in and of itself that it will give the Hollow Bastion's famous genetists and bio-chemists most envious since they have not the pleasure of examing and interacting with these people. It is safe to assume that the strange animals have a strange diet, developed immunity, and tolerance as well. It will do the Thirteenth Order good if we can capture one of these natives to experiment on their digestive track and to examine their DNA as well as their genetic make-up.

All of the inhabitants of Melee Island have evolved differently when all of the worlds have formed, 97% of the worlds' inhabitants have the same genetic ancestor with Hollow Bastion, except for the Melee Island world. It fits for this world's hellish environment and comedy cartoon nature.

What is considered as "normal food" is rare, but it is still present in this world. One must know where to search and what restaurant to venture in.

P.S. – I'm starving and Demyx is staring at me as if I'm edible. I am forced to quit writing since both the neophyte and this report is starting to look like the longest French fries ever.

**4/11**

Author's note: Sorry, it took a year-ish to get back to this life caught up with me and I found some new fandoms.


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